


aeonian

by madkingray



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Friends to Lovers, Happy Ending, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Post-Kerberos Mission, Pre-Kerberos Mission, Slow Burn, Telepathic Bond (Sorta), Voltron Seasons 1-6
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-15
Updated: 2018-12-15
Packaged: 2019-09-18 13:00:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 24,501
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16995453
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/madkingray/pseuds/madkingray
Summary: Keith, throughout his life, with the constant that is Shiro. From meeting him as Officer Shirogane, to saving him from certain death out in the stars, to a state of happiness he never thought he could achieve.





	aeonian

**Author's Note:**

> HI. Before you get into this, I need to say that I wrote this immediately after season 6 and finished it before any season 7 information came out. It is drastically different from what actually happened in canon, and I left it sitting in my google docs because I fell out of love with it after the season 7 premiere.
> 
> After finishing season 8, I decided to fish this out and post it - I had it finished, I already edited it, a couple of people looked it over... It was ready, so why not? ^_^!

“Students, we have a representative here from the Galaxy Garrison! He’s going to tell you all about what it’s like to be in a school dedicated to learning and studying space travel. Please give a warm welcome to Officer Shirogane!”

Keith rolls his eyes when the other students enthusiastically clap in greeting, leaning back against his seat to gaze at the person— _Shirogane_ —who enters the classroom and stops in front of the blackboard.

He’s not really impressed.

(But he might be. A little.)

“Hello,” Shirogane says with a smile. “As your teacher said, I’ve been sent here to tell you about the Garrison; the classes we offer on campus and what opportunities may arise while you’re there. I will be taking questions at the end and I am more than happy to talk about my own experiences if you’d like. How does that sound?”

Keith turns his head to stare out the window as noises of agreement echo around the room.

He doesn’t look at him throughout the whole lecture, knowing that the teacher will most likely pull him aside afterward and scold him for not paying attention. Keith will accept the punishment she’ll dish out (scraping gum off the undersides of all the desks, probably), but he can’t find it in him to care.

Besides, he’s not actually ignoring Officer Shirogane.

It’s all an act.

There’s no way Keith will ever make it to a school like the Galaxy Garrison, so he chooses an apathetic front to get through the whole thing. Better to never get his hopes up about something he’s wanted since childhood than to be heartbroken over it.

But he still listens… and he still wants.

 

☆ ☆

 

It’s Friday, which means the ones in charge of his current home will be coming home later than usual.

He’s learned that they like to go out and celebrate making it through the week by grabbing drinks with friends or having dinner with them (depending on the mood) so as long as Keith makes it home before they do, then he’s able to stay out for a long while.

Which is exactly what he plans to do once school is over.

Keith is sitting in the last period of the day, waiting for class to start, when Officer Shirogane steps in with his teacher. He pretends to ignore the lecture again, staring down at his textbook as if it were the most interesting thing in the universe (it’s not), and he only glances up when the lights are dimmed.

Officer Shirogane brought videos and pictures to share with the class.

It’s hard for him to act like he doesn’t care when they show clips of the flight simulators that they have at the Garrison, all based on missions that actual people went on. He sneaks a few peeks while the rest of the class remains entranced, eventually giving in and watching with his full attention.

Three cadets enter the flight simulator, working as a team as they guide the pilot through obstacles and achieve the goal of landing safely. Keith watches with wide eyes, hands itching to have a go—but he instead imagines the rush he’ll get from flying an actual ship, soaring through space and reaching heights he could only dream about.

It’s all he’s ever wanted.

The video ends when the simulation does, a clip of the daily training regime appearing on screen. Keith has to rub the dryness out of his eyes (he didn’t want to miss a thing, so he refused to blink), and accidentally meets Officer Shirogane’s gaze when he tries to go back to his mask of indifference.

Shirogane flashes a knowing smile.

Keith stares down at his desk, refusing to lift his head even when he rushes out the door once class ends.

 

☆ ☆

 

He’s out in the desert, wind blowing through his hair and a wide smile on his face as he speeds through it on his father’s hoverbike. It’s his favorite thing to do at the end of the week, pushing himself to new limits and trying out different tricks just like he used to do with his dad.

Keith might not be able to fly high enough to touch the stars, but this is close enough.

When orange begins to bleed into the sky, Keith makes a sharp turn and starts making his way up to one of the higher points of the area—it’s more like a ledge than a cliff, but it’s certainly high enough for Keith to get injured should he fall off.

He stops by the shack he once called home, parking outside the front door and running in to grab a bottle of water. Keith was smart enough to leave a few in there when he last visited, along with a box of granola bars to keep him going until dinner.

Keith walks out after scarfing down two of them, water bottle in hand as he heads over to the hoverbike.

“You’re a natural.”

Keith jumps, whirling around with his teeth bared as his eyes fixate on the source of the voice. He has to force himself to relax when he sees that it’s the Garrison officer from earlier, Shirogane, remembering past warnings from old families to _‘not be so weird’_ (often paired with a hit so he wouldn’t forget).

Baring his teeth like a feral cat definitely counts as weird.

“How’d you find me?” Keith asks suspiciously, gaze flicking over to the sun and back. Okay, he still has enough time to do a couple of tricks, hide the hoverbike, and get to the home.

“I was in the area when I saw someone racing across the desert, so I came to investigate,” Shirogane says, pushing himself off the Jeep he’d been leaning against. “I didn’t expect to find you out here by yourself.”

There’s a questioning lilt to his last comment, one Keith can either answer or ignore.

Normally, he’d choose the latter and leave before any more question follow—however, the curious expression on Shirogane’s face makes him pause. It seems a lot more genuine than what he’s encountered in the past.

“I have a license,” he starts, narrowing his eyes at him. “So it’s not like I was doing anything illegal. I can show you if you want.”

“No, no. It’s fine. I believe you.”

And how strange is that? To have someone believe him without demanding more and more proof, and without accusing him of being a delinquent even when he’s done nothing wrong. Keith’s faced those kinds of people too many times to count, enough for him to believe that those older than him will only let him down.

Maybe Shirogane is just a weird one.

“It’s fine if I’m out here, as long as I’m home before dark,” Keith says as an explanation, keeping his head held high. “I don’t need anyone to watch over me. I can take care of myself.”

“Of course you can,” Shirogane says with a nod and although the words seem patronizing, his tone is not (even more strange). “Do you have room for one more on there?”

Keith looks at him, looks at his hoverbike, and then looks back at him. “I’m not supposed to get into rides with strangers,” he says pointedly. “All I know is that you’re an officer from the Garrison.”

_How am I supposed to trust you?_

“You’re right,” Shirogane replies, a thoughtful look on his face. “Alright, then let’s start over. My name is Takashi Shirogane.” He holds out a hand. “But you can call me Shiro.”

He eyes the hand warily, eventually reaching out to shake it. “Keith,” he offers, climbing onto his hoverbike and starting it up. Once it purrs to life he looks over at him. “I’ll let you hop on,” he tells him. “ _If_ you tell me more about the Garrison.”

Officer Shirogane— _Shiro_ —grins at him, walking over and sliding into the empty space behind him. He keeps enough distance between them, which Keith appreciates.

“You got yourself a deal,” Shiro says. “Now, show me what you’ve got.”

 

☆ ☆

 

After the first afternoon they spent together, riding through the desert until the sky turned pink-purple, they fell into a routine of meeting up with each other every Friday after school. Shiro claimed that it was just a coincidence, that he was in the area and found out it was him by chance, but Keith can sense that it’s a lie.

He was waiting for Keith, just like Keith has started to wait around for Shiro after a few weeks have passed.

It’s… nice to know someone who seems to enjoy the speed as much as he does, someone who isn’t concerned about Keith getting hurt because he trusts in his skills.

Shiro pulls through on his end of the bargain and talks about his life at the Garrison whenever the two of them are seated on the ground, sipping at their water bottles as they take a much-needed break. He tells Keith about how much work it took to get there, how he only had one person in his life who believed in his dreams—the emphasis on _had_ makes him straighten, but he doesn’t prod for more on that subject.

Keith’s had plenty of people do the same to him whenever he mentioned the lack of a mother and the loss of his father, he knows how annoying it can be.

He likes when Shiro talks about the flight simulations he’s done, the different missions he’s cycled through, the thrill that he feels when he’s sitting in that pilot’s seat, the records he’s set and how no one has beaten them yet.

That’s one of the things that Shiro seemed really proud of, so proud that Keith couldn’t help but interject with a teasing, “I’ll beat them if I ever go there.”

Shiro’s face was open and sincere when he replied, “I wouldn’t doubt it.”

All that belief directed at him in full force was enough to make Keith’s face burn. He forced himself to stare down at his water bottle so his flush wouldn’t be seen, nodding along to Shiro’s descriptions of all the instructors and higher ranking officers at the Garrison.

They’re at a point where Keith tentatively considers Shiro a friend, his _first_ friend. He might not be able to admit it out loud, for fear of scaring Shiro away, but the sentiment remains.

There’s also an issue of trust on his end, which has been there since he found out his mother left him—a hard truth, especially when his father never told him the reason _why_ she left which led to him believing that it was because of him.

And yet…

He thinks he’ll be able to trust Shiro completely, someday.

(A part of him wants to already.)

“Would you ever want to go to the Garrison?” Shiro asks a week later, while the two of them are cruising around on Keith’s hoverbike (as always). “You seem pretty interested in the school, so I was wondering…”

“Maybe,” Keith answers. _Yes._ “I never really thought about it, you know?” _I think about it all the time._ “It doesn’t seem like there’s a place for me there.” _But I want there to be._

He eyes one of the smaller cliffs and makes a hard turn, speeding up as he starts heading for it. Cliff diving on his bike is an exhilarating experience, one that he’s yet to put Shiro through. “I’m gonna drive off that,” he tells him loudly, grinning to himself. “Better hold on!”

“A-Are you sure that’s safe?”

“It is! Just trust me!”

“I always do!”

Shiro’s voice has gone up a pitch as they near the cliff, but the honesty is still present in his words. Keith can feel himself soften, his smile turning pleased as he basks in the feeling of his trust before it shifts to a smirk. He drives them off the cliff, releasing a loud _whoop_ of excitement and laughing at the curse he hears behind him. Just before they hit the ground, he activates the thrusters and speeds off with Shiro’s own laugh ringing in his ears.

“That was pretty amazing,” Shiro says after they’ve done it a few more times, hair messy and smile wild. “Probably better than the simulators at the Garrison.”

“Probably? I bet it doesn’t even come close.” Keith slides off the bike, stomping his feet several times to get rid of the wobbly feeling in his legs. “I’m glad I made it fun for you, I was pretty scared when my dad tried it with me.” He laughs. “Then I couldn’t stop begging for him to do it every time we went out. I might have annoyed him a few times, but he still did it just for me.”

“That sounds really nice,” Shiro replies with a laugh of his own. “All my grandfather did was drive me around in his minivan to put me to sleep, sometimes.” He leans against the hoverbike with his arms crossed, a proud smile on his face when he says, “You’d do great at the Garrison, Keith.”

Keith’s eyes go wide, the unexpected compliment making his heart skip a beat. “You really think so?” he asks, disbelief in his voice.

“I know so.”

Excitement flares up within him, because high praises like that usually meant that they had to be true, before it’s snuffed out—the reminder that he could never achieve such greatness coming up and swallowing him whole.

Something must show on his face because Shiro’s brows knit together as his expression turns concerned. “What’s wrong?”

“I’ll never be able to make it there on my own,” Keith says quietly, staring down at his feet as he kicks a rock away from him. “The home I’m in… there’s not a lot of money…”

“You don’t have to worry about that, Keith. You’re amazing on your hoverbike and I can imagine you’ll do just as well in a simulation. Heck, you’ll probably be setting your own records in them!” Shiro’s smile makes a return. “The Garrison would be crazy to not have you there, they’d be missing out on a really talented pilot.”

“How can you be so sure I’ll get in?” Keith asks, though he’s sure it comes out more demanding than he’d like.

“I’ll make sure they look at your application and give you the chance you deserve,” Shiro says. “I promise you, Keith. You’re going to get into that school.”

Keith just stares at him.

Shiro’s smile grows wider and then he’s reaching out to place a hand on his shoulder. Keith flinches instinctively, tense beneath his hand. Although he sees Shiro's eyebrows climb, the man says nothing about it, and Keith slowly relaxes. “You belong in the Garrison, Keith. I’m not just saying this as a recruiter, I’m saying this as your friend.”

_Friend._

It’s overwhelming to have what he wants most within reach, to know that he can do what he’s dreamed about since he was a child. It almost seems too good to be true, like someone will arrive and tell him that it was a big elaborate prank—because who the hell would want a troubled orphan boy in their school?

Keith trusts Shiro enough to know that everything he’s saying is true, that he truly believes Keith deserves a spot in this school; he just doesn’t understand _why._

So, he asks.

“Why are you helping me?” Keith asks desperately. He needs to—no, he _has_ to know. “Why would you care about some nobody like me?”

“You’re not a nobody, Keith. You’re someone who is going to do amazing things with his life, and I want to give you the chance you deserve.” Shiro crosses his arms, lips curved upwards. “You know, I see a lot of myself in you. Except, I had someone to encourage me to do what I wanted most of all. I want to be that someone for you.”

Shiro looks so sincere and kind, which is more than he’s received since his father died and something he’s still not used to seeing despite being around Shiro so much. His throat closes up, astounded by the idea that someone might actually care about him enough to support and encourage him to achieve his dream.

He’s throwing himself forward without thought, wrapping his arms around Shiro and squeezing his eyes shut as they begin to well up with tears. Shiro releases an exclamation of surprise, and Keith slowly begins to relax when the embrace is returned.

“I’ll be with you every step of the way,” Shiro says. “I promise you.”

Keith believes him.

 

☆ ☆

 

Two weeks later, Shiro brings a manilla folder full of papers for him to read through and fill out. They forgo flying to focus on this, Keith carefully penning out all of his information that his father made sure he memorized in case something happened to him.

“You’ll have to come in to complete some tests,” Shiro explains as Keith is flipping through a packet. “Everyone who has entered the Garrison had to do them. It’s not like the tests you get in school now, they just want to see how you fare in a simulation and in the training room. The most you’ll do is pull-ups and run a few laps.”

“Doesn’t sound too hard,” Keith comments. “Are there going to be other kids with me or am I going to be alone?”

“There will be others with you, yes,” Shiro says as drapes an arm across his shoulder and tugs him close, other hand ruffling his hair. Keith immediately starts squirming and complaining while it happens (all an act, he secretly likes it). “Maybe you’ll make a new friend!”

Keith snorts. “Yeah, right.”

“Even if you don’t… I’ll still be there for you, Keith. I’m not going to drop you just because you join the Garrison, or because I was only looking to recruit you.” Another hair ruffle, and this time Keith doesn’t protest. “Like I said before, you’re my friend.”

“You’re, uh, my friend too,” Keith mumbles, feeling rather shy all of a sudden. “Thank you for doing all of this for me, Shiro.”

“It’s no problem at all. I want you to have the future that you deserve.”

They stay out for longer, sitting atop the small cliff as they eat the sandwiches Shiro brought for them and talk more about the Garrison (which turns into Keith asking a bunch of questions and Shiro patiently answering them all). Keith tries not to scarf his food down, knowing that he might not be able to eat as much when he gets home, but it’s so hard to take it slow when it tastes so good.

Maybe Shiro can see the future or read his thoughts because he pulls out an extra sandwich for them to split and it’s enough for Keith to feel completely satisfied and full.

“I guess I better get going,” Shiro says about an hour later, pushing himself up and brushing the crumbs off his pants. “I don’t want to get in trouble for being out late.” He grins and starts walking over to his car. “Again.”

“Will I see you again next week?” Keith can’t help but ask, hoping he doesn’t sound _too_ eager.

Shiro turns to look at him, and his smile makes Keith’s stomach flip in the strangest way. “Next time we meet will probably be at the Garrison,” he says, actually sounding excited about it. “So I’ll see you soon, Keith.”

“See you,” Keith breathes, watching Shiro carefully make his way over to his car and climb inside. He keeps his eyes on the vehicle until it becomes a speck in the distance, only looking away when it disappears.

His own smile appears while he’s on his way to the home, leaning his head against the window of the bus as he stares at the buildings they pass by. It doesn’t leave him even when he’s back at the home, where it’s thankfully unnoticed by everyone in there.

When he goes to sleep that night, he dreams of touching the stars with Shiro right beside him.

 

☆ ☆

 

Being at the Garrison is both exhilarating and overwhelming.

Even if he ends up being there for only that day, the Friday after Shiro brought him the forms (yes, he did miss school, but the trip excused him from all classes), Keith is still happy to finally see it with his own two eyes.

A senior officer meets with them at the front gates, and the first thing they do is give him and the group he’s with a tour of the school. They are also all given campus maps so they know where they’re going.

The officer shows them all the different facilities and classrooms at the Garrison, explaining what classes can be taken there (which Keith already heard from Shiro) and what the schedule may be like if they enter this school.

A gruff looking man stops them when they are passing by the offices, and he introduces himself as Commander Iverson—the head of the school.

He goes over all the rules and regulations that they will be expected to follow, staring at them all intently. Commander Iverson seems to linger on Keith for a while before leaving without another word, allowing the tour to continue.

All of them are taken to the cafeteria in the afternoon, allowing them to experience first-hand the taste of the food that’s served at the Garrison. It’s not great, but food is food and Keith has learned to never complain, lest he gets it taken away from him.

Shiro makes an appearance after they’ve all eaten, not saying a word as the officer introduces him as their ‘best pilot and poster boy at the Garrison.’ He offers a friendly smile to the group when the others clap for him and gives an even warmer one to Keith.

Keith can’t help but beam back at him, ignoring all the stares that he’s getting.

The senior officer leaves to prepare their tests, so Shiro is the one who takes them to the infirmary so the nurse can get their information—weight, height, blood pressure, blood type, if they have any diseases that run in the family, and if they have to take any medication. He then guides them to the fitness room once they’re done, the first officer making a return to test their stamina.

Keith genuinely has fun during this test. He’s always been told that he has a lot of energy within him, often leaving him wound up and irritated since it has nowhere to go. This workout helps a lot and he’s able to finish it quickly without breaking much of a sweat.

The next test is the one he’s been waiting for and it would have him practically vibrating with excitement if he wasn’t in control of himself.

Shiro and a different officer lead them to the flight simulator and leave them huddled in a group while they prepare it for them. Shiro grins at Keith and nods up to the observation window, giving him a two-finger salute before walking off; he guesses that he’ll be up there with the other officers.

“This simulation is a solo one, so we’ll call you up one by one to see how well you do in it,” the officer is saying, jotting something down on her clipboard. “Do not worry if you crash, the first run is a practice run and the second one is what we’ll be recording.” She clears her throat and stands up straighter. “I’ll be calling you up at random, so today we will start with…”

She points right at Keith and he nearly jumps out of his skin, following her into the flight simulator and nodding along to her explanation of how to start it up.

The simulation starts seconds after she exits and Keith directs all of his focus onto it, grinning as he flies through with ease. It’s such a rush to finally be able to do this and he can’t help but feel disappointed when he completes it.

He wanted it to last forever.

The officer stops him before he can go back to his spot in the group, peering at him curiously. “Get back in there and do it again,” she commands.

Bewildered, and excited once again, all Keith can say is, “Okay.”

He completes it again.

It’s completely silent when he exits the simulator, all the other kids wearing expressions of annoyance while the officer looks utterly gleeful. Keith lifts his head higher and realizes that the other officers are angled towards him, faces ranging from surprise to respect.

Shiro’s smile is the only thing that quells the anxiety in his gut as he shuffles his way over to the end of the group without another word, crossing his arms as the officer continues to pick kids at random.

In the end, he’s the only one who managed to complete it.

“We’re done for the day,” the officer says once they finish, clipboard at her side. “We’ll head back to the cafeteria for an early dinner and then send you back to school. Remember, it's not guaranteed that you will get into the Garrison and if you do get in, you might not get the position you wanted.” She dips her head once. “You will be told at the end of your current school year if you have been accepted and once you arrive you will be given another test to see how well you do with a crew.”

Shiro pulls him off to the side when she begins leading the others to the cafeteria, grinning widely as he ruffles Keith’s hair. Keith swats at him half-heartedly, smiling back at him.

“Good job!” Shiro says cheerfully. “I think I’m the only one who wasn’t surprised that you managed to do it.”

Keith frowns. “Do what?”

“You managed to beat my record by finishing it quicker than I did. None of the officers thought it would ever be beaten, you definitely surprised them all today.”

“Oh.” Keith chews on his bottom lip. “Really? I beat it?”

“Yup.” Shiro pops the _p._ “That’s why everyone looked so impressed. Also, beating the actual simulation on your first try?” He pulls Keith in for a side hug. “You’re talented, kid. I bet you’ll be up in space before the rest of us.”

“If I get in,” he mutters. “There’s no guarantee.”

“You will. I’ll make sure you do,” Shiro replies, the promise heavy in his voice. “You belong here, Keith.”

(Shiro loudly states, “I told you so,” after Keith tells him that he’s been accepted into the Garrison, and laughs when Keith threatens to toss him off the cliff.)

 

☆ ☆

 

Life at the Garrison seems rather simple, at first.

There are classes they have to go to, homework that the instructors throw at them, books they have to read, and training they have to do. Keith is okay with the routine his life has gained, though he still keeps to his room whenever they’re given free time.

He ended up being one of the lucky ones to not get a roommate and he often looks around his dorm (his! All his!) in disbelief. Keith always had to share when he went from home to home, too many kids and too little money to give them all their own personal room, but now… now he has his own space.

Shiro still talks to him as the days pass, complaining (whining) about work he has to do and the tests he still has to sit through despite being an officer.

“Junior officer,” Keith will always correct, rolling out of the way to avoid a pillow to the face.

It’s good, really good, especially when they get to go to the flight simulators from time to time. Sometimes in teams of three and other times by themselves.

The only thing wrong with the place is that he keeps getting more attention after every go at the simulator, stares and whispers that follow him wherever he goes. He’s not one to care about what other people think of him, so he keeps a neutral expression on at all times and ignores it.

It doesn’t work out too well since he ends up in a fight not even a week later.

Shiro is the one who guides him and the other kid (brown hair and a name he can’t remember) to the superior officer’s office. Keith keeps his eyes fixed on the floor, even when he has to sit on the chair and wait for his punishment to be delivered, fists clenched tightly in his lap when he feels the burning glare that comes from his classmate.

He doesn’t want to see the disappointment in Shiro’s eyes.

 _This is it for me,_ Keith thinks miserably. _Shiro’s gonna realize how much trouble I am and give up on me, just like everyone else._

Keith doesn’t think he can live through Shiro telling him that he messed up, that there’s no longer a place for him here, so Keith waits with bated breath and says all of that before Shiro can.

Except, that’s not the outcome.

_“Keith, you can do this. I will never give up on you.”_

That’s a promise that only one person has made before, his father, and even then it was something that comes automatically with being a parent.

_“But more importantly, you can’t give up on yourself.”_

He’s so surprised by it, staring at Shiro’s earnest expression in astonishment. Keith can see that Shiro truly means his promise and… it’s a lot, to know that someone has an unwavering belief in him and continues to support him even when he messes up.

Keith carries those words with him as he heads back to his dorm after talking to the superior officer, Shiro promising to stop by later with some food and bandages (if he needs them). He even repeats them quietly to himself as he sits at his desk, reveling in the warmth that begins to blossom—slowly spreading throughout his body and making a home there.

It will remain a constant in his life, just like Shiro.

 

☆ ☆

 

“We won’t get in trouble for this, right?”

“It’s a free day! They won’t care!” Shiro’s got a grin on his face as they make their way into the large garage, steering him towards Keith’s hoverbike. “We’re allowed to be outside anyways, I’ve got the passes for us and everything.”

“Alright,” Keith says slowly, climbing onto the bike and waiting for Shiro to follow. “Just know that I will not hesitate to throw you under the bus if they start asking me questions.”

Shiro laughs in his ear, pressed up against his back as he wraps his arms around Keith.

No one even looks their way as Keith takes them out of the garage, heading towards the nearby town on Shiro’s request. He hops off and tells Keith to wait, darting into one of the markets. Keith ignores the few curious glances he receives and fiddles with his leather gloves, the fingerless ones that Shiro gifted him for his birthday last year. They’re a bit too big on him, though Shiro seems confident that Keith will grow into them soon enough.

“I have no clue how I’m going to hold onto this and you at the same time.”

Keith lifts his head, expression going flat when he sees the pack of beer that Shiro is holding—the cheap one that leaves a bad taste in his mouth (then again, they all do). “Really?” he asks, snorting in disdain. “You should have at least gotten a better brand.”

“This one is good!” Shiro exclaims, climbing onto the hoverbike. Keith can feel the coolness of the beer cans through his hoodie and he has to fight his shiver.

“Literally any other beer is ten times better than that one,” he tells him, waiting for Shiro to finish shifting around behind him before taking off. He grins at Shiro’s loud _whoop_ of excitement, enjoying the way the air sends his hair flying.

They arrive at their destination about fifteen minutes later, Keith separating the knots from his hair as he kicks the door open to the old shack. He always brings them here whenever they escape the Garrison for a day or two, and they’ve been here enough times to leave a change of clothes, sleeping bags, and some snacks for whenever they get the munchies.

“Do you wanna hang around in here today or go up on the roof?” Keith asks, going over to their box full of snacks and grabbing two bags of chips. He tosses one to Shiro. “Also, are we staying the night?”

“Roof, so we can look at the stars,” Shiro answers after catching the bag, shoving it into the pocket of his jacket. “And yeah, we’ll stay the night. I thought ahead and requested another free day for us, I didn’t want you to drive us back full of beer.”

“You’re the one who’s gonna drink most of it,” Keith mutters, but he unrolls their sleeping bags and leaves them on the floor for later. “To the roof, then.”

They easily climb up onto the roof, Shiro setting the pack of shitty beers between them as the sun begins to set behind them; drinking and talking about whatever comes to mind. Keith already feels tipsy more than halfway through his first one while Shiro, who drinks more beer than he does, has just finished his third when he starts feeling something.

Keith figures it also has to do with how big he is… not that he thinks about that.

He sips at his lukewarm beer and grimaces while Shiro nurses his fourth, eyes half-lidded as he gazes out into the desert. Keith taps a little tune against the bottle, chewing on his bottom lip while he thinks.

Maybe it’s the buzz he feels that causes him to open his mouth, maybe it’s the courage he gains after he downs the rest of his beer in one go, or maybe it’s because he wants to open up to Shiro more than he already has, especially about the place they always retreat to.

“This used to be a part of my old house,” Keith says quietly, staring up at the glittering stars. The beer is honestly starting to make him feel a bit drowsy, words becoming softer as he continues to speak, “My dad would do some work in there and let me play around outside. The actual house is gone, and so is my dad, but at least this is still here…” He exhales shakily. “I miss him.”

“Tha’s good,” Shiro mumbles, and Keith doesn’t even flinch when Shiro wraps an arm around him. “My _Jiji_ an’ I lived in a nice little home. I had to leave it when I lost him, ‘cause I wasn’t old enough to live on my own.” A sniffle. “I miss him too.”

“Look at us,” Keith remarks with a small, sad laugh. “Two little orphan boys missing the days when life was so simple and easy, when we had someone to protect us from the world.” He throws his empty beer bottle off the roof, sad that it doesn’t shatter on the ground like he wants it to. “Then we had to grow up too fast, learn how hard life really is.

“I miss when it was easy,” Shiro sighs out. “Everythin’ gets so much, sometimes… so many expectations, so many things t’do, so much time spent being _perfect._ ” He’s staring down at his half-empty bottle, eyes shining in the moonlight. “I wish I had someone to keep me safe.”

Keith hates the way sadness takes the light out of Shiro, who has always been as bright as the stars in the sky—untouchable, at times, and so beautiful.

A sudden urge arises from within, the need to tear apart anyone who dares to put that expression on Shiro’s face, to harm those who threaten to harm Shiro. It’s intense because he’s never thought this about anyone before, but once it settles down deep into his bones he realizes… it feels right.

“I will,” he says, waiting for Shiro to look at him. “I’ll keep you safe, Shiro.”

Shiro’s eyes go wide and in the light of the moon, Keith can see his flushed cheeks turn a shade darker. “Really?” he asks, sounding both shocked and awed. “You will?”

“Of course,” Keith promises. “I’ll protect you until the day I die.”

Maybe that’s a bit too much but Shiro has a happy smile on his face and he pulls Keith in for a warm hug, so that makes it worth it.

They stay up there for a little longer, Shiro slurring out the stories for the different constellations and Keith simply watching him fondly. When it starts to get a little too cold for them, Keith slides off the roof and stumbles when he lands on his feet.

“C’mon, Shiro,” Keith calls out when Shiro peeks over the edge. “It’s fine! You won’t break anything!”

“I’m scared!” Shiro replies with wide eyes.

“You big baby,” Keith says warmly, holding out his arms. “Jump down! I’ll catch you!”

“There’s no way you can catch me!” Shiro’s frowning down at him. “You’re too small! I’ll crush you! I’ll crush you like a bug! And then I’ll be very sad.”

“Just do it! We don’t have all night.”

Shiro still looks unsure, even as he sits down at the edge of the roof. He slides off and lands into Keith’s arms with a rather adorable squeak. Keith sets him down right away, cheeks growing hotter at the of wonder on Shiro’s face—it’s the beer, definitely the beer.

“You’re strong,” Shiro murmurs.

“Yeah, uh, I guess the Garrison fitness center is working out for me,” Keith says, rubbing the back of his neck.

Actually, Keith has always been a bit too freakishly strong. He was able to lift things that were much heavier for the average person and at some point had to downplay his own strengths so he wouldn’t stand out.

He hopes Shiro forgets this, he doesn’t want any questions about it.

“Come on,” he says quietly, grabbing Shiro’s arm to lead him into the shack. “Time to sleep.”

Keith holds onto Shiro while he attempts to kick off his boots, unable to decipher his mumbling as he helps him into the purple sleeping bag. He wiggles his way into the red one after tossing his boots towards one of the corners of the room, shifting closer to Shiro when he releases a soft, sad whine.

“Keep me safe?” Shiro asks in a sleepy voice.

Pulling his hand out of the sleeping bag, Keith brushes Shiro’s forelock back. “Always,” he replies softly and is rewarded with the tiniest smile before Shiro’s breathing evens out.

He drifts off only a few minutes later.

It’s still dark out when he wakes, Shiro remaining asleep even when Keith slides out of the sleeping bag and pads over to the snack box. There’s not much he can do for breakfast, with what they have, but Keith figures that Shiro will appreciate some oatmeal with freeze-dried fruit.

Keith is halfway through his own bowl when Shiro finally wakes up, groaning while he presses his hands to his face.

“Feelin’ good?” Keith asks, laughing when Shiro just groans again. “Get up, big guy. I made you some food.”

“Spoon feed me,” Shiro replies in a whiny, miserable voice. After spending so much time with him, Keith has caught onto the fact that Shiro is secretly a huge baby and is willing to show in ways like this.

“Nope. You have to come over here and eat it yourself like a big boy.” Keith pats the empty plastic chair beside him. “It’s just oatmeal! I even added your favorite fruit.”

“Peaches?” Shiro slowly makes his way over. He scoots the chair closer to the table, resting his elbow on it and pressing his fist against his cheek while he eats. “Better enjoy ‘em while I can, could be the last time I have some.”

“What do you mean by that?” Keith asks, popping a piece of strawberry into his mouth.

“Oh,” Shiro says after a while. Then, with more feeling, _“Oh.”_

“What? What’s wrong?”

“I wanted to tell you something yesterday but I, ah, forgot because I’m an idiot who decided to buy beer and got excited about drinking it with my best friend.” Shiro’s eyes are fixed on his bowl of oatmeal. “Remember how I told you that there’s a mission to Kerberos later this year?”

Keith sets his spoon down and stares at him. “Yeah…?”

“They want me to be the pilot.”

Everything seems to come to a standstill, Keith’s blood roaring in his ears while Shiro carries on as if he hadn’t just dropped the most shocking news. He belatedly remembers to breathe when his lungs begin to burn and drops his gaze to the table, brain trying and failing to come up with something to say.

 _He’s going to leave you just like everyone else,_ an ugly voice in his head hisses. The old pain rises up and nearly makes him choke, and he plays it off as a cough when Shiro looks over at him in concern.

 _Shiro doesn’t need this,_ Keith tells himself, swallowing it back down and plastering a smile on his face. _Shiro needs support._

“Congrats, Shiro,” he manages to say. “You’re finally getting what you deserve, I’m so proud.” He nudges him with his elbow, smile much more real. Keith means what he’s saying, there’s no doubt about that, but that doesn’t lessen the pain. “Don’t forget me while you’re up there, okay?”

“As if I could ever forget you,” Shiro says with a snort, looking over at Keith with a frown. “I wish you could go with me, then the mission would be more than perfect.”

The hurt suddenly fades away at that, replaced with such strong appreciation for his best friend. There’s a tinge of shame that trickles in, berating himself for even thinking that Shiro would be like everyone else.

They’re best friends. Shiro going to space won’t change that.

“I bet we’ll go up together on the next mission after that one,” Keith says with a grin, going back to eating his oatmeal. “And if they don’t pick us, well, I’m sure they’ll eventually leave one of the shuttles unattended.”

“They’re not going to just forget to watch over a shuttle, Keith! We’ve had this argument like a million times!”

“It’s bound to happen someday!”

 

☆ ☆

 

“Hey, Keith?”

“Hmm?”

“You’re coming to the Kerberos launch, right?”

Keith blinks down at his textbook, slowly lifting his head to stare at his best friend. Shiro’s not even looking at him, gazed fixed on the pen that he’s tapping against the table—he’s nervous; Keith can tell by the way his mouth tightens and brow furrows.

“I thought only family was allowed,” Keith says with a frown.

“Well, uh, being the pilot of the mission means that I get to make a few special requests.” Shiro finally looks up at him, the faintest smile on his face. “I asked if you could see me off since you’re my family, and they allowed it.”

A familiar warmth rises up from within, except this time it settles down in his chest and curls around his head; making a home in the place that’s only been open to two people (his father and Shiro). It’s so much stronger than the trust that Keith already feels for him, but he can’t put a name to it.

“Of course I’ll go,” Keith answers softly, hiding his smile by ducking his head when he sees Shiro light up. “I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

“Thanks,” Shiro says softly, and then asks, “Can we still have our movie night? I’m looking forward to watching all those old movies with you.” He sighs. “I can keep those in my memory while I’m off in space for a year.”

“These are the movies you _don’t_ want to remember,” Keith tells him. “For example, there’s a series called _Sharknado_ —I’m sure you can tell just how horrible they’ll be based on the title alone.”

“How does that even work?” Shiro says thoughtfully. “Is it a tornado of sharks or is it a shark-shaped tornado? Or, maybe a shark that turned _into_ a tornado?”

“You’ll just have to wait and see…”

They spend almost every second together as the launch date nears; watching movies, playing video games, sparring, stargazing on the roof, eating, sleeping in the same room, and sometimes sitting in a comfortable silence.

To know that he won’t be seeing his best friend for so long makes Keith’s stomach drop, already starting to feel the terrible distance between them. They’re not going to be able to contact each other, and Keith doesn’t know how he’ll last for a whole year without Shiro by his side.

It’s a bit dramatic, he knows, but Shiro is still pretty much his only friend—he’s allowed to be.

The feeling is mutual, at least he knows that.

(Shiro had confessed a while back that Keith was his first true friend. There was a sad smile on his face when he explained that being put on a pedestal made it harder for people to look past his ‘perfect image,’ how they never really tried to get to know him and all they wanted was to showcase their ‘friendship’ like it was some sort of trophy.

“You always look at me and you just see me,” Shiro had said, smile turning softer, happier. It made Keith’s heart skip. “I could never ask for a better person to be best friends with.”)

When the day of the launch finally arrives, Keith wakes up with a lump in his throat. He gets to have breakfast with Shiro but while Shiro is shoveling food down his throat like no one’s business (“I won’t have these eggs for a year, Keith. A year! I need to treasure them while I can!”), Keith is struggling to put a bite into his mouth. His appetite his absent, stomach twisting with anxiety as the minutes fly by.

He eventually manages to drink some juice and eat a bite of his apple, only to mollify the look of worry Shiro shoots him.

Eventually, it’s time.

Shiro leads him over to the gates that surround the shuttle, pointing up at it and talking about its details with enthusiasm. Keith tries to pay attention, he really does, but all he can do is stare at Shiro’s face to commit this moment to memory.

He doesn’t even look away when Shiro glances over at him, face turning puzzled. “What’s wrong?” he asks. “You’re staring at me funny…”

“A year is a long time,” Keith says, staring down at his feet. He scuffs his heel along the ground. “I might miss you.”

“Might?”

Keith nods and doesn’t say anything else, heart growing heavy in his chest. He doesn’t mean to rain on Shiro’s parade, but their separation is looming ahead and it’s all he can think about right now. A shaky exhale leaves him when he peeks over and catches sight of Shiro’s understanding expression.

“C’mere,” he says, and Keith sinks into the hug without hesitation.

His throat closes up, eyes welling up with tears. He buries his face in Shiro’s shoulder and clings to him, praying that his trembling remains unnoticed.

"Keith," Shiro murmurs softly, fingers threading through his hair.

It's a soothing gesture that developed one night on top of the Garrison roof, the two of them gazing at the stars and leaning against each other for warmth. Keith had fallen into a doze when Shiro started speaking of the tales that gave the constellations their names, eventually drifting off to sleep when Shiro allowed him to rest his head on his lap and began stroking his hair.

He's associated it with comfort and safety, faint memories of his father doing the same thing trickling into his mind. It made him trust Shiro more than he already did, falling further into his orbit

"Keith," Shiro says again. "Look at me?"

It takes a while for him to gather the strength to pull away, leaning back with a tiny sniffle and wiping at his eyes before doing so.

Shiro's staring at him with the softest smile, one that he's rarely seen, and he takes a step closer—limiting the space between them. He speaks in a whisper, as if someone will overhear him despite the two of them being completely alone, "You don't have to worry, okay?" His hand comes up, fingers tucking a strand of hair behind Keith’s ear. "I'll be back before you know it."

"I'll still miss you," Keith confesses, dropping his gaze to the floor. His heart already hurts and Shiro isn't even gone yet. "Sometimes you're so far out of my reach, I'm afraid one day I'll lose you."

"Hey, hey, none of that." A finger tucks itself beneath his chin, gently forcing his face up. They're even closer now. "You'll never lose me, Keith. I'll always make my way back to you."

As always, Shiro never actually says the word _‘promise’_ but the sentiment is there; written in his earnest expression and shown in his actions. He always goes above and beyond to follow through, especially when Keith is involved.

A new feeling erupts in his chest—stealing the air out of his lungs and making his stomach swoop. He can't find the right name for it, but he knows that he feels it strongly and it belongs to one person: Shiro.

"I'm holding you to that," Keith replies, lips curving upwards when he hears Shiro's soft laugh.

They embrace each other once again, hands clasped between their chests as they hold onto each other tightly. Keith doesn’t cry this time, but there’s a lump in his throat that refuses to go away. He forces himself to step back when the call for Shiro comes, barely an inch between them as Keith stares into his eyes.

“Well,” Shiro says, a sad smile on his face. “I guess this is—”

“Don’t say goodbye,” Keith tries not to plead, but he’s certain that some of his desperation and fear leaks into his voice. He clears his throat and looks at the shuttle instead, embarrassment coloring his cheeks red.

“Why not?”

“I hate goodbyes… it makes me feel like you’ll be _gone._ ” _Like you’ll never come back,_ Keith thinks, faint memories of his mother stirring in his head, stronger ones of his father right behind it.

“Didn’t you hear what I just said? You won’t lose me.” Shiro sounds both fond and understanding. He knows Keith better than Keith knows himself, at this point. “I won’t say it, though. Is ‘see you later’ good?”

“That’s… better.”

Keith feels something against the top of his head, a pressure so light that he almost doesn’t register it. He looks up in time to see Shiro moving away, pink dusted across his cheeks.

“See you later, Keith,” he says softly, squeezing his hand once before slowly pulling away. Their fingertips graze over each other, the touch lingering for a second more until Shiro finally strides over to where he’s needed.

He stands in the same spot and watches him leave, walking away when Shiro heads into the shuttle with his two other crew members. Keith stays in the area of safety with a woman and her daughter as the shuttle starts up its launch sequence, staring up and up and up as it slowly becomes a speck in the sky.

“See you later,” Keith later says to the stars when he’s sitting on top of the Garrison roof all alone.

 

☆ ☆

 

_Pilot Error._

_PILOT ERROR._

_P I L O T  E R R O R._

The screen displays the words in bright red five months after the Kerberos crew left the Earth. Keith almost doesn’t believe it at first, staring at Shiro’s smiling image in shock. Everyone else has fallen silent, whispers starting to break out, and Keith noisily pushes his chair out from his table so he can get the hell out of that cafeteria.

Stares follow him as he walks down the halls—his friendship with Shiro was never a secret—and he wonders if they’re waiting for him to break.

They’re going to be waiting a long time because he’s not sad or broken right now, no.

He’s angry, and he’s going to get some answers.

“Pilot error? What the hell does that mean?” Keith asks after barging into the Commander’s office, palms flat on the desk as he leans forward to glare at him. “Why are you putting the blame on him?”

Commander Iverson leans back against his office chair and regards him with a cool gaze. “It means what it means,” he says. “Shirogane is the one at fault for the Kerberos mission. He pulled a risky maneuver that turned out to be a mistake and it cost the lives of himself and his crew members.”

“I don’t believe you,” Keith says hotly. “Everyone knows that Shiro would never make a mistake when piloting a ship, so maybe it’s all you higher-ups that are at fault.” He manages a laugh, ugly and mean. “I bet he’s still out there. I bet you’re lying to cover up something you did. I bet—”

“He’s dead.” Commander Iverson says sharply. “And you better watch your tone, cadet. You’re a talented pilot and I would hate to see you go so soon.” The threat is plain as day— _behave or we’ll kick you to the curb and sully your name like we’re doing to Shiro._

Keith glares and opens his mouth.

Commander Iverson looks down at the papers on his desk. “Dismissed,” is all he says.

He has the strongest urge to tear the room apart and show Commander Iverson his rage, so strong that not even the sharp bite of his nails pressing into his palms can bring him back from it. Keith forces himself to turn around, slamming the door as loudly as possible before rushing to his dorm room.

Once he’s there, he locks the door and lets go.

The anger drains away after he’s done, too tired to cling to it as he stands in the middle of the mess that was his room. It becomes buried beneath the blissful nothingness that trickles in afterwards, the only thing that gets him through the rest of the month.

He goes to class, he eats lunch, he does his homework, he completes the flight simulators, he goes to sleep—over and over and over again until he can go through the motions on autopilot, existing instead of living.

Keith doesn’t openly mourn like some of his classmates, the ones who keep their heads bent low while their tears drip onto the floor. He doesn’t want to showcase his vulnerability for the whole school to see.

His grief is private, only set loose when he’s in the privacy of his own room. It spills out of the cracks in his soul and fills up his lungs, leaving him gasping for air while the taste of salt lingers on his lips.

The reminder that he’s lost the most important person in his life is constantly around him: the report playing on various screens, their instructors reminding them of what could happen, classmates chattering about it in the halls, and other officers discussing it in hushed tones before a flight simulator test.

He’s good at ignoring it and has gotten better at controlling himself, though he often resorts to biting the inside of his cheek or digging his nails into his wrist to prevent his emotions from exploding outwards.

The pain manages to reel him back from the edge every time, and while Keith knows that it’s not the most healthy way of dealing with it, he can’t bring himself to care.

Shiro was the only one who cared about him and helped him move past whatever issue he was dealing with. Now that he’s gone, Keith is left to deal with it by himself just like he used to do before Shiro entered his life.

It works and it allows him to keep moving forward with his life, even with the heaviness he carries in his chest.

Until one day, it all falls apart.

A new simulation is introduced and he ends up being chosen to be one of the first ones to try it out, led in with the usual people he was paired up with and waiting for it to start up. When the image of their location appears on screen he immediately freezes, recognizing it from the long nights of Shiro excitedly explaining where he was going.

He purposefully fails, ignoring the indignant cries that came from his crew members as he makes his way out of the flight simulator

Commander Iverson is already there, looking unsurprised when he storms up to him and hisses out, “You have no _right._ ”

“But we do,” is the reply he gets, cool and unbothered. “The next generation has to learn from their predecessor’s mistakes, after all.”

This is when he snaps, his rage bursting out of its cage and setting him alight.

Keith is throwing his fist without thought, sinking it into Commander Iverson’s left eye and knocking him to the floor. The other cadets jump away from him when he follows him down, wordless snarl leaving him when he throws another punch, and another, and another, and another…

There’s blood on his knuckles when Senior Officer Montgomery sits him down and demand answers from him, hand throbbing when he clenches and unclenches it. He says nothing when she asks for an apology from him, turns his head away when she adds on that Commander Iverson will consider allowing him to stay at the Garrison if it’s sincere enough.

“All of you are full of shit,” he finally says when she continues to push and prod, smug satisfaction flooding through him when her expression shifts to cold anger.

Even when they toss him out into the desert with nothing more than his minimal belongings, he doesn’t regret it. Why would he want to stay in a place that tore apart Shiro’s reputation? Why would he want to stay when they would attempt to mold him into becoming another ‘ _Garrison Golden Boy?_ ’

 _You know I hate being called that,_ Shiro’s voice says in his head, playfully disgruntled like it always was when Keith made fun of him for the title.

At least the Garrison allows him to take his hoverbike out of the garage, though he’s certain they would have kept it if they didn’t know he’d put up a fight for it.

Keith hops onto it and speeds away without looking back.

The sun is high in the sky by the time he arrives at where he wants to be, the old shack that was always next to his childhood home. It’s the only thing that remains out here, so far out that not even the Garrison knows about it.

The last time he was out here he was with Shiro, the two of them sitting on top of the roof while Keith laughed until he cried as Shiro belted out song after song in the most ridiculous voices—it was only a few weeks before the Kerberos mission, at that point, and Shiro had been so _loud_ and _alive._

 _Now he’s gone,_ he thinks as his vision grows distorted, hot tracks trailing down his cheeks and leaving the taste of salt on his lips.

He drowns in his despair.

Keith remembers cursing at the blue sky when the sun was up high, the heat searing into his skin as he tore his heart out of his chest and screamed himself hoarse; asking _why, why, why,_ until his lips cracked and his throat burned. The taste of iron filled his mouth, skin tinged red as he forced himself to stay out; a penance for opening himself up to another person, bitter disappointment over being left behind once again slowly oozing through the cracks.

He remembers collapsing to the ground when the moon replaced the sun, bringing forth a chill that seeped into his bones. His voice grew softer, pleading words tinged with desperation as he begged for Shiro to return to him, apologizing over and over and over again for what he said only hours before. Tears slipped down his cheeks and into the soil, planting the seeds of his sorrow as he grieved the most important person in his life.

It hurt. It hurt more than anything he’s ever dealt with in his entire life so far.

Not even the loss of his father held a candle to this.

Keith considers, for a moment, letting himself die out here—a slow death beneath the burning sun, fading away bit by bit until all that’s left is bones that’ll end up buried beneath the desert, forgotten like he used to be before Shiro entered his life.

It’s not like he has anything more to live for.

He doesn’t know how long he’s been outside, it could have been hours or days, but Keith only picks himself up when his mind latches onto a stray thought.

_Shiro wouldn’t want this._

His lips are cracked and dry, skin sunburnt in some places, head throbbing and dizzy from being in that heat, and his body is sore in so many places, but he pushes himself forward until he steps over the threshold of the shack.

Keith goes straight to the pile of canned and boxed food he has in a corner, nibbling on a granola bar and sipping on some water. When his mind clears somewhat, he heads out and spills some water onto a small towel, wiping off all the dirt off his skin.

The sun is up high, shining through the windows of the old shack, and yet he still shuffles his way over to the couch and curls up beneath the ratty blanket. He’s exhausted enough to ignore the sunlight, weariness sinking into his bones and slowly dragging him to sleep.

“You promised me,” Keith whispers hoarsely, staring at the far wall that has a newspaper clipping announcing the pilot for the Kerberos mission pinned to it—Shiro’s picture at the center of the page. “You promised you’d come back.”

There’s no reply, not that he expected one.

Ghosts can’t talk, after all.

 

☆ ☆

 

Living in the desert is harder than it seems.

Keith came out here with barely anything, no plan in mind to sustain himself in the shack. Keith doesn’t let that stop him. He’s a survivor, he always has been, and he can adapt to this new situation.

He feels so lost.

Keith tries not to think about Shiro too much while he’s out there, not wanting to grieve more than he already has It’s hard to wade through and often drags him down into its depths, leaving him desperate for the breath of air that refuses to come.

There is still news coverage on the incident, playing over the radio in his shack or plastered across screens when he heads into town for supplies.

 _‘Pilot Error,’_ they always say. _‘Dead.’_

 _Gone,_ Keith mentally corrects. _Just gone._

Now that he’s in a much calmer mindset (as calm as he can be, at least), Keith slowly begins to let go of the idea that Shiro is dead. There’s been no evidence that he is and the Garrison refuses to comment.

Shiro had promised that he would never give up on Keith, so why should Keith give up on him?

He’s out there amongst the stars, in a place where Keith can’t reach. It still hurts, that’ll never go away, but Keith holds onto his belief tightly and refuses to let go. That’s the only thing that keeps him afloat.

Time passes and there’s soon a whisper in the far distance of the desert, an energy that calls to him and beckons him close. Keith should be wary, he really should, but he figures that searching for whatever’s out there might give him a purpose.

Keith covers his wall with a map and marks paths that lead him to the center of the energy source, jotting down possible theories of what it could be. There are even times when it keeps Keith up all night, restlessness thrumming beneath his skin and sending him out the door before the sun even rises.

He can admit that he may have grown obsessed with discovering the truth, wanting to know why he’s feeling this strange energy and what it all means.

Muted joy races along his skin and causes his hair to stand on end when he discovers a cave with strange markings carved into the walls, depicting images of an oddly shaped beast and telling the story of an arrival.

Having invested in a cheap camera the last time he went into town for supplies, Keith takes pictures of these carvings and adds them to his wall when they’re developed. He searches for around the shack for a packet of sticky notes, writing down what the markings said to him.

(Keith finds a picture of himself and Shiro in the drawer that had the sticky notes, windswept hair and rumpled Garrison uniforms creating a messy look for them. Shiro had been captured mid-laugh, eyes crinkling at the corners and smile bright, while Keith’s face was turned towards him, expression soft and fond as he watched.

The picture crinkles in his hands, a wretched gasp tearing itself out of his throat as his tears make a return. He curls in on himself when he sobs silently and presses the image close to his chest, releasing the pain he’s kept locked up since he started venturing out into the desert.

Later, much later, he’ll smooth out the picture and pin it beside all of his findings. He’ll add a sticky note with it and scrawl out one line that spells out the unconditional truth that lies in his heart.

 _It’s killing me when you’re away._ )

The energy seems to climb higher and higher every time he returns to the cave. Everything around him seems to vibrate with anticipation, giving him the impression that the foretold arrival will be happening very soon.

It abruptly envelops him one night, causing goosebumps to spread across his arms as excitement—not his own—rushes through his body. Impatience is the next emotion he feels, feeling a tug at his very being. He rushes out of the shack and into the desert when the sun hangs low in the sky, darkening as the seconds pass.

Somehow, he knows that it’s time.

Keith races across the desert on his hoverbike as a flash of light streaks across the sky, and he stops to watch its path until it hits the ground with a distant crash. He can see the Garrison light up, can see the tiny specks of light that indicate vehicles going straight for the unknown.

It could be mistaken as a meteor, but Keith just knows that it’s anything but.

He waits until they’ve secured the area, the officers more focused on the ship (and it’s definitely that, he can tell with one glance) and its contents. Keith discreetly drives to the farther side of the area and plants the bombs he found in the shack. He speeds away to put distance between himself and the explosives and heads for the domed tent they’ve pitched up.

Keith sets the bombs off and ignored the chaos all around him as everyone rushes towards the source. He parks his hoverbike and hops off it, the energy pulsing through him— _here, here, here,_ it tells him. _This is it!_ —as he quickly heads inside.

He’s not sure what he expects to find, but it certainly isn’t the man who has been haunting his dreams.

“Shiro?” Keith questions in a breath, heartbeat loud in his ears. He looks at his face again and although his appearance is different from the last time he saw him, Keith could pick him out in a crowd of millions.

It’s really Shiro.

 _His_ Shiro.

Escaping the Garrison officers with Shiro (and three extra people) on his hoverbike is the only other excitement of the night, adrenaline dying out once they all make it to the shack without anyone following them.

Keith carries Shiro in with the help of the other three, though he could have easily brought him in himself. They set Shiro down on the couch and Keith ignores their stares as he seats himself at the edge of it.

He stares at the scar that’s settled across the bridge of Shiro’s nose, the shock of white hair that’s replaced the black forelock Keith used to always tug at for his attention, and the prosthetic arm that seems to hum with inhuman energy.

 _Who did this to you?_ Keith thinks fiercely. A fire has been ignited within him, the urge to take down whoever harmed Shiro so strong in that moment.

It abruptly dies down when he hears a very faint whimper, almost inaudible with how low it is. Keith’s focus is back on Shiro, catching the furrow of his brows before he turns his face away—a nightmare, perhaps.

Keith scoots up so he’s sitting by Shiro’s head, reaching out to thread fingers through his hair. He combs through the small knots with gentle strokes, watching Shiro’s face slowly relax and go slack as he falls into a deeper sleep.

They used to do this to each other at the Garrison. It was their tactic to help the other go to sleep, ministrations both soothing and reassuring.

“I don’t have any beds,” Keith says quietly, finally addressing the other three in the room. “There should be some blankets and a couple of sleeping bags in the corner, though. You can use those while I stay up to keep watch.”

There’s a protesting noise that becomes muffled not even a second later, and then he hears them all shuffle away. Keith doesn’t take his eyes off Shiro, refusing to stop what he’s doing even when his hand begins to ache.

Sometime later, Shiro’s eyes fly open with a panicked gasp. He’s breathing hard, a faint tremor coursing through him, so Keith gently cups his face with both hands and sweeps his thumbs across his cheeks.

“Shiro?” He keeps his voice soft, waiting for Shiro’s gaze to find his own. “Shiro it’s me, Keith. You’re safe. I’m not going to let anyone hurt you, I promise.”

“Keith,” Shiro breathes out, the wildness to his eyes gradually disappearing. “Keith…”

“Yeah.” Keith offers a small smile. “It’s me.”

He’s definitely surprised to feel arms wrap around him, one metal and one not, but Keith is quick to get over it and reciprocate. Keith doesn’t mention the way Shiro breathes in too deeply after he buries his face in Keith’s shoulder or the way his hands grip the back of his jacket tightly. All he does is hold Shiro just as tight, withdrawing when he hears his breathing start to even out.

“Sleep,” he tells him, gently guiding him to lie back down. “I’ll be here.”

“Keep me safe?” Shiro’s eyes are already closing, fully relaxed once again.

He leans down and presses a kiss to Shiro’s forehead, Shiro’s content sigh becoming ingrained in his head. “Always,” he whispers, catching sight Shiro’s faint smile before he drifts off.

Keith has to blink away the tears that suddenly spring to his eyes, chest light with the overwhelming relief that’s ready to consume him. God, he almost can’t believe that Shiro’s back—sleeping on his couch as if he wasn’t missing for more than a year, as if Keith hadn’t mourned him several times over.

“Thank you,” he whispers into the dark, to whatever being out there that brought Shiro back to him.

Shiro wakes up again a couple of hours later, still groggy but much more alert. Keith helps him to the shower outside the shack (and boy, wasn’t that a bitch to attach), grabbing a pile of clothes on the way and leaving them for him. They’re the only ones he has that will, hopefully, fit Shiro.

Keith heads back inside to give him privacy.

The three that helped him escape with Shiro are still hunkered down in the corner, though the one in yellow seems to be wide awake and is flipping through a notebook while the other two are beginning to stir. Keith grabs three water bottles from one of his tables and leaves them by their sides, peering out the window to see Shiro striding up the hill.

He heads out and walks up to him, placing a hand on his Shoulder. God, he’s so solid and real beneath it. Keith never wants to let go.

“It’s good to have you back,” he tells him.

 _I missed you,_ he doesn’t say. _I missed you more than anything. I grieved for you, I wept for you, and now I can’t believe you’re standing right beside me._

Shiro lifts his head, a faint smile on his face. “It’s good to be back.”

 

☆ ☆

 

After trying to become a better team and forming Voltron several times in a row, Keith thought he’d be able to sleep peacefully. His restless mind says otherwise and doesn’t allow him the respite.

Instead of staying in bed to try and force sleep upon him, he decides to walk through the castle in an attempt to mentally map out the place.

With how large the castle is, he can tell that it’s going to take a lot of time.

He passes the kitchen and stops, backtracking when he hears rustling inside. The doors slide open when he gets close enough and he’s surprised to see Shiro standing in front of the fridge, looking back at him with equal surprise.

“Oh,” Keith says, stepping in further. “Hey, Shiro.”

“Hey,” Shiro says. He holds up one of the water pouches they all drank earlier in the day. “Do you want one?”

“Sure, toss it over.” Keith catches it when Shiro obeys, leaning against the counter once he’s close enough. “Thanks.”

“Thought you’d be asleep. You said you’d be out the moment your head hit the pillow.”

“I thought so too,” he admits. “I feel tired physically, but mentally? I guess forming Voltron multiple times was a bit too much for my head.” Keith sighs, finishing his water and crushing the pouch. “What about you?”

“Same thing.” Shiro takes the crushed pouch from Keith’s hands and tosses both of theirs into the small trash can. “Wanna go walk around? If we get lost we’ll at least be lost together.”

They peek into every room they come across, finding multiple paths leading to the bridge (which is helpful, something they both agreed upon), another set of sleeping quarters (much smaller than the ones they got), a strange room made of mirrors, and even another kitchen.

“This place is too big,” Keith mutters when they stop in a room with a window large enough to show the beautiful outside view. “It’s gonna be hard to remember where everything is.”

“Probably,” Shiro says, going over and sitting down on one of the steps leading to the window. “It’s not so bad, though. Nicer than the Galra ships, at least.” He’s staring down at his bionic arm with an unreadable expression.

Keith walks over and sits down beside him, scooting closer and holding a hand above the Galra arm. He meets Shiro’s gaze for a moment, wordlessly asking for permission to touch.

Shiro’s exhale is loud, expression wary, but he eventually nods.

Keith brushes over the metal palm with his fingers, tracing over the seams in his hand and trailing up to explore the rest of it. There are no rough patches or ridges, the whole arm strangely smooth beneath his touch. He does feel a low buzz whenever his skin touches the metal, similar to the energy of the lions while also feeling so vastly different.

“Does it hurt?” Keith asks.

“Not really,” Shiro answers. “It’s just… weird. Feels like it doesn’t fit me, sometimes.”

Shiro was tense when Keith first started, but now he’s slowly beginning to relax. He even allows Keith to touch the scar on his face and he keeps his fingers light as he skims the edges of it.

“I don’t even remember when I got it,” Shiro says quietly. “Or when I lost my arm. I’ve been having some flashbacks and dreams, but I can’t tell if they’re real or not.” He sighs. “My head is still foggy.”

“You’ll remember soon enough,” Keith says confidently, threading their fingers together. Shiro’s hand remains cool in his grasp. He reaches up to tug on Shiro’s forelock with his free hand. “What about this? Did the Galra cause this as well?”

“No, uh, I think it was from stress,” Shiro replies with a furrowed brow. “I remember that the hair was a gradual change, it didn’t happen immediately like the arm and the scar.” He tips his head to the side and asks, “Does it look bad?”

“It looks good,” Keith answers honestly. “It fits you.”

“Well, good. Now I don’t have to worry about that,” Shiro says with a huff of laughter. He leans back against the step above him, gently squeezing Keith’s hand. “You’ve changed too.”

Keith blinks and asks incredulously, “Have I?”

“You lost some of that baby face,” Shiro says teasingly, though his eyes are serious. “Your hair looks longer and you got taller. You seem rougher around the edges, too.”

“Yeah, well.” He shrugs. “I had a difficult year.”

Pain flashes across Shiro’s face. “I am so sorry, Keith.”

“No, no. You have nothing to apologize for, Shiro. I’m just happy that you’re here now.” Keith smiles sadly at him. “It was hard at first, but it got better after I was expelled from the Garrison. I had something to focus on.”

“You mentioned that before,” Shiro says with a frown. “The Garrison thing. What happened?”

“I punched Iverson in the face. I punched him more than once,” Keith answers, trying to hide his twitching lips. “They gave me the boot when I refused to apologize for what I did.”

“Why’d you punch him?”

Keith directs his gaze to the stars. “It’d been building up for a while, you know? After the news of what happened to you hit the screens…” He exhales shakily. “Iverson refused to give me answers and I let it go, feeling lost without you. Later in the month, they introduced a new mission to the flight simulators and I was picked to be one of the first ones to test it. I ended up purposefully failing because I read the word ‘Kerberos,’ and that was it.”

“I wish I’d been there for you…” Shiro’s words are tinged with regret. “They shouldn’t have put you in that position when they knew how close we were.”

“It’s all in the past and I don’t regret it,” Keith says, waving a hand. “I was able to search for that energy that was calling to me… which led to me finding you.” He stares down at the floor, sadness leaking into his voice. “I just wish I’d been there for you, Shiro.”

“I don’t. We know what the Galra can do, especially to people who oppose them. I hope I never have to know about what they would do if they had you like they had me.”

Keith lifts his head and sees that his eyebrows are drawn together, looking as if the mere thought of that possibility brings him pain.

“They’ll never get me,” he says, hoping to ease those worries. “I’ve gotten better at fighting and I have you to watch my back whenever I need it—just like you’ve got me to watch yours.”

Shiro opens his mouth, probably wanting to argue, but a yawn comes out instead. He seems embarrassed about it after it passes. “Sorry,” he mumbles. “Guess I’m more tired than I thought.”

“S’fine.” Keith offers a smile and pushes himself up to stand. “Do you wanna head back to the rooms?” he asks, holding out a hand. He’s already noticed that Shiro tends to favor his left hand at times, as if he’d rather not deal with his foreign one, and he hopes to show Shiro that he doesn’t mind touching it.

“I don’t know… I might just stay here. I don’t even know if I’ll be able to sleep,” Shiro says with a drawn-out sigh.

Keith chews on his lip as he considers that. Trouble with sleep isn’t a new problem for the two of them, usually resolved whenever the two of them shared a room or a bed—the promise of safety with the one person they trusted the most lulling them to sleep.

“We can share mine, if you want,” he offers in a quiet voice.

Shiro relaxes before his very eyes, his relief palpable when he says, “Thank you.” He takes Keith’s hand (with his right one) and pulls himself up, a faint smile appearing on his face. “I’ll drag my sheets in and take the floor, if that’s okay.”

“Whatever you’re comfortable with.”

It ends up being a thing with them whenever they can’t sleep, going to the other’s room and bunking with each other to get some rest. Sometimes, Keith will end up waking up long before Shiro and just gazes at his peaceful expression—it makes him look younger at times, less burdened with what he’s gone through.

(Sometimes, the sight makes his heart skip a beat.)

 

☆ ☆

 

 _“You’re like a brother to me.”_ Because that makes sense, right? That’s the only thing that can describe the intensity of what he feels whenever he’s around Shiro. Familial, because Shiro’s been his only family for so long.

Shiro drags him to his room after everything has been explained, helping Keith out of his paladin armor and the undersuit when his exhausted limbs refuse to move—face turned away when Keith holds onto him to put on a pair of his boxers and a tank. He shakes his head at the offered binder, knowing that it won’t help much (at least he’s with Shiro, the only person he’s comfortable with to exist without it).

“It’s not bleeding as much,” Shiro notes when they’re standing in front of the mirror in the bathroom, sliding the right tank strap down and pressing a damp towel against the wound.

Keith lets out a wry chuckle. “At least there’s that.”

He begins to wipe it down and Keith watches the white towel turn pink, touch gentle and murmurs apologies whenever Keith hisses.

“You know, I could have done this myself,” Keith mutters, though he doesn't move away from Shiro.

“I know,” Shiro says, rinsing the towel off in the sink and ringing it out before moving it back to his shoulder. “I’m not doing this because I think you can’t, I’m doing this because I want to take care of you. I want to make sure you’re okay.”

“I’m fine,” he replies automatically, voice coming out more tired than intended. His stomach does that familiar swoop because of Shiro’s comment and he ignores it like he always does.

“You and I both know that’s not true.”

Keith exhales shakily, staring down at where his hands are gripping the edge of the sink. “I’m not,” he concedes. “But I will be.”

“We have enough time to nap before we get into discussing the plan to take out Zarkon for good,” Shiro says, voice taking on a lighter tone. “Actually, I’m ordering you to bed as the leader of Voltron and your personal nurse.”

“Ordering me, huh?” Keith manages a tiny, amused smile. “Guess I can’t argue with that. Orders are orders, after all.”

“Is that how you talk to your superior?” Shiro scolds, but the smile on his face breaks the act.

Keith rolls his eyes, his own smile growing wider. “Yes, sir.”

“That’s better.”

Shiro drops the towel in the sink, leaning over to pick up one of the bandage packets they pilfered from the medical wing and covers up Keith’s wound. After he’s done, he slides the tank strap up to where it belongs and steps away.

“It’s gonna scar,” Shiro informs him. “I wish you’d gone into the pod…”

“We both know that there’s no time for that,” Keith replies, slowly making his way into his bedroom. Now that Shiro’s mentioned it, a nap sounds like a fantastic idea. “How much time do I have?”

“A couple of vargas—er, hours.”

“Hard to get used to, huh?”

“You don’t know the half of it. Altean time measurements are so different.”

Keith climbs into bed and pulls his blanket up to his chest, watching as Shiro shuts the light off in the bathroom. He expects Shiro to leave, now that he’s done his job, but instead he sits down on the floor and tips his head back against the wall.

“You don’t have to stay, you know.” Keith says. “I’ll be fine, just come back and wake me up when we start the planning.”

“I’m not gonna leave you,” Shiro says with a frown. “And before you say it, they don’t need me right now. Allura can do her interrogation all by herself.”

“Come up here, at least,” he says, pushing himself up and patting the empty space beside him. “The floor doesn’t look comfortable.”

“I’ll be fine. You know I will be.”

“Shiro. Please.”

Even though Shiro releases an exasperated sigh, Keith knows that he’s won. He shifts until his back hits the wall and lifts the blanket up so Shiro can slide underneath. They’re lying on their sides, so close to each other, and Keith can already tell that it’ll be easy for him to doze off with the warmth that Shiro radiates.

“Reminds me of the Garrison,” Shiro says with a faint quirk to his lips. “All those times you fell asleep on my bed when we were supposed to be studying…”

“Oh, yeah?” Keith raises a brow, trying not to smirk. “I seem to recall the times when you knocked out on mine before we even opened up a book.”

“Lies, all lies. You’re memory is bad.”

Keith lets out a huff of laughter. “Someday, the rest of the group is going to find out how much of a little shit you are. Your reputation will be ruined.”

“Someday,” Shiro says airily. “But not today.” Both his voice and face soften when he says, “You should sleep, Keith.”

He should, he really should.

But all Keith can think about is the way Allura’s eyes hardened after the reveal of Keith having Galra blood in him, how she bore holes into the side of his head with her glare. Coran seemed to be on the fence about it, pain and understanding written on his face whenever he looked at Keith. Hunk, Pidge, and Lance are the only ones that have been treating him like normal—a bit wary at times, more jokes here and there, but still… normal.

He just doesn’t know how Shiro feels.

“Does this change your view of me?” Keith asks in a whisper, body tense as he awaits the answer. _Do you hate me?_

“No,” Shiro answers, and Keith almost stops breathing when Shiro brushes two fingers down his cheek. “You’re still you.”

He slowly relaxes, pretending that he’s not tearing up from that simple statement. Keith closes his eyes and drops his head on the pillow, shifting closer to Shiro’s warmth.

“Thank you,” he breathes, exhaustion beginning to drag him to sleep.

Keith swears he hears Shiro mutter something like, “Keep you safe.” He also feels gentle fingers sweeping his hair back and a light pressure against his forehead before he’s out.

 

☆ ☆

 

Losing Shiro feels so much worse the second time.

The pain claws at his insides, reopening that old wound of grief and letting it pour out all over him. He doesn’t plead to the stars like he did before, because his heart _knows_ that Shiro is still out there—he’ll come back to Keith like he promised.

Or maybe Keith will be the one to bring him home.

“Please, no,” he says quietly, desperately, when the Black Lion chooses him as her pilot. He knows it’s what Shiro wanted, but the idea of accepting his new role feels like he’s betraying Shiro. It feels like taking his place and giving up on his search, giving up on _him,_ when he’s still out there.

He tries, and he still fucks up at being the leader of the team, he fucks up at being Shiro’s successor, he fucks up and keeps fucking up and doesn’t even get the chance to breathe. Keith is drowning in his anger and grief, and no one is bothering to give him a life jacket. They leave him there and let him sink to the bottom while still expecting him to fill shoes he could never fill.

Shiro wanted this for him, but Keith doesn’t know if he can do this without him.

But he tries.

He tries working through it to make it all better for them. Keith’s not perfect, he’s known that for a long time, but he seems to reach a middle ground that satisfies the rest of the team. He shoves his grief to the side to focus on being the leader of Voltron, pretends that he isn’t being torn apart inside and slowly bleeding out.

Going into the alternate reality and meeting Sven is another knife to his heart. He looks so much like Shiro, but at the same time looks so very different.

It hurts, it hurts a lot, but the fact that this is a reality different from theirs helps lessen the pain.

In a spare moment between them, Sven quietly admits that Keith looks similar to someone he once knew. Sadness is prevalent in his voice, regret strong in his eyes—the man still mourning what he lost.

Keith wonders if his own face looks the same.

A part of him feels sorrow. Even in an alternate reality, his and Shiro’s fates are destined to be full of pain. The universe forces them apart no matter who they are, bringing more tragedy into their lives as if they haven’t suffered enough.

The other (guilty) part of him feels relief. He’s not the only one who is going through this suffering.

Then, a miracle happens.

Shiro comes back to him.

He’s barely hanging on to the threads of life, and yet he still manages to burrow into Keith’s side after he carefully pulls him out of the dead Galra fighter ship. He rejects the offer of a healing pod, accepting the water pouch and small bowl of food goo that Hunk passes over before quietly pleading with Keith to take him to his room.

“It’s good to have you back,” Keith says once Shiro is settled in bed.

A tired laugh leaves Shiro’s lips. “S’good to be back,” he mumbles, staring back at him for a few seconds more before his eyes slip shut. His voice has a tinge of desperation when he asks, “Keep me safe?”

Keith sits down on the edge of the bed and runs gentle fingers through his hair, waiting for Shiro to relax beneath his touch. “Always,” he replies, catching the small curve to his lips.

He heads to the bridge where the rest of the team is waiting, averting his gaze to avoid their hopeful expressions. “Sorry, guys. I don’t think he’s up for coming out just yet.” Keith looks over at Allura. “I know we want answers, but I’d rather have him well rested before we start asking questions.”

Allura nods once and starts up a discussion on how they’ll take over the Galra outpost they’ve been eyeing up for a while. The planning, coordinating, and actual mission takes only a couple of days and they complete it successfully.

He checks up on Shiro after he’s changed into his civilian clothes, surprised to see him awake. The tired lines are still present in his face, but he already looks better than when Keith first found him.

“Hey,” says Shiro.

“Hi,” says Keith.

They talk for a while, Shiro sitting up in bed with his sheets sliding down to his waist and Keith standing a few feet away. He seems rather confused with what he’s saying, uncertainty an undertone in his voice. Keith doesn’t want to push for more, not when he’s certain that Shiro would rather forget being with the Galra again, so lets it go once the theory that Black teleported him is out in the open.

“Well, if you’re feeling up to it, the rest of the team would be thrilled to see you up and around again,” Keith tells him. “They need you, you know.”

 _I need you,_ he doesn’t say.

The words are ready to come pouring out but instead, he swallows them down and lets them cut up his insides. He can’t be selfish and put that on Shiro right now, he’s been through enough.

The words stick to his throat

“Yeah, I’ll try.”

Shiro calls his name before he can step out the door, eyes are curious when Keith looks back at him

“How many times are you gonna have to save me before this is over?” Shiro asks, a faint smile appearing afterwards.

He doesn’t even have to think about it, smiling back as he answers, “As many times as it takes.”

It’s the absolute truth.

Shiro is the only one that Keith would go to such lengths to save. He was there for Keith when no one else was and became a permanent fixture in his life, helping him become the person he is today. It’s only fitting that Keith should save him time and time again, because Shiro saved Keith back when he needed it most.

Keith would do anything to save Shiro. If that means dying for him, then he’ll do so with a smile on his face.

He has to lean against the wall outside Shiro’s room, clammy hand pressed to his mouth as he chokes on the emotion that swells up and threatens to escape. So much time has passed and he still can’t put a name to it, can’t define the intensity of what he feels when it comes to Shiro. There’s no time to do it now but someday, hopefully, Keith will be able to figure out what it is.

“As many times as it takes,” he quietly repeats to himself, breathing deeply in an attempt to control himself before continuing his walk to the bridge.

It’s enough.

 

☆ ☆

 

Keith’s in the bathroom of his old room, peeling the gloves off his suit so he can run shaking hands through cold water. He splashes some onto his face and exhales harshly, staring at his reflection while water drips down his face.

He’s alive, but he doesn’t feel like he is.

The knock on his door startles him, heart racing in his chest. He quickly shuts the water off and grabs a small hand towel, dabbing his face cry and letting it fall to the floor. Keith stumbles over to his old bed and practically collapses on it, closing his eyes as he tries to get himself together.

Another knock.

Maybe they’ll go away if he ignores them…

Even more knocking follows, much more insistent than before, followed by a familiar voice, “Keith? I know you’re in there. Please, let me in.”

_Shiro._

Keith sighs and pushes himself up, slowly making his way over to the door. He inputs the code to unlock it and takes a step backwards at it slides open, arms crossed as he keeps his eyes on Shiro.

“Matt told me what happened,” Shiro says, looking… frazzled. His eyes are slightly bloodshot, hair messy like he’d been running a hand through it several times. “I didn’t want to believe him, so I came straight to you.” He visibly swallows and stands up rigidly, as if bracing himself for the answer. “Tell me it’s not true, Keith.”

Keith knows exactly what he’s talking about.

He can’t lie to Shiro, he never could, so… he says nothing.

That seems to be answer enough, judging by Shiro’s minute flinch. “Why, Keith?” he asks, sounding so distraught. “What were you thinking?”

“I was thinking of a way to get the shield down so all of you wouldn’t die,” Keith replies, uncrossing his arms and keeping his head held high. His hands fall to his sides, clenched into fists to hide how they shake. “There was no other way.”

“You could have died! You can’t just through your life away like that! If it had been a second later…” Shiro looks haunted by the thought. “There could have been another way, a better one that ended with everyone making it out alive.”

“Shiro,” Keith says slowly, patiently. “I get what you’re trying to say, I really do. You have to understand, I had no time to think things through out there. Maybe it wasn’t the best choice to make, but if it had been a second later, then I would have saved you—and that would have made it worth it.”

“Keith…”

“I’ll do anything to keep you safe, Shiro. If it means dying, then so be it!” Keith’s voice wavers as these next words tumble out, full of an emotion that’s too strong for him to contain. “Your life is much more precious than mine.”

Shiro’s choked sound catches his attention, alarmed to see a shine in his eyes. His expression is full of disbelief and Keith tenses up when he suddenly strides forward, coming to a stop in front of him.

“Shiro?” Keith prods, placing a hand on his arm.

“You’re so…” Shiro audibly swallows. The anguish on his face is enough to make his heart hurt. “I can’t…”

Keith is surprised when Shiro wraps his arms around him and hugs him tightly, head bent low and tucked into the crook of Keith’s neck. He feels Shiro’s shuddering breath against his skin when he reciprocates the embrace, holding onto him just as tightly.

“Shiro?” Keith repeats, blinking when all he does is shake his head. “Come on, Shiro. Talk to me.”

“I can’t lose you, Keith,” Shiro finally says in a pained whisper. “Not you. I don’t know what I’d do with myself if you…”

“Hey, hey.” He withdraws from the embrace so he can look at Shiro, reaching up to cup his face with both hands. “I’m right here, Shiro. You haven’t lost me.”

Shiro covers Keith’s hands with his own, tension draining out of him. He’s starting to lean into Keith’s space, a tell that Shiro was close to falling asleep. He brushes his thumbs over his cheeks and asks, “How long has it been since you last slept?”

“S’been a while,” Shiro says with a sheepish smile. Though his eyes carry a hint of sadness, they look much brighter than before. “Too busy dealing with… everything.”

“You know you don’t have to take it all on yourself,” he tells him. “Let the rest of the team help you, Shiro. Lighten the load. I don’t want you to drive yourself into the ground.”

“I’ll do my best.”

Keith helps peel off his armor until Shiro’s left in the undersuit, gently guiding him to the bed (letting him take the side closest to the door, just the way he likes it). He climbs in on the other side and tries to quell the nerves that make a rampant return, stilling when Shiro hums a questioning note.

“I’ll keep you safe,” Shiro whispers once Keith looks at him, eyes already slipping shut. “Just like you keep me safe.”

“I know you will,” Keith replies, waiting for Shiro’s breathing to even out before leaning up to press a kiss to Shiro’s forehead. He still feels shaky, but it’s much more tolerable than earlier. “And I’ll still do the same for you like I always do.”

 

☆ ☆

 

Keith is sitting in front of the fire as he lavishes Kosmo with attention. The wolf is wagging his tail as if he were a normal Earth pup and he even whines when Keith temporarily stops petting his head to greet his returning mother, nudging his hand until he continues.

 _So spoiled,_ Keith thinks fondly.

“I got more meat for us,” Krolia says, dropping the body of the large beast that dwells in the forest nearby. “This should last for a few days, at the very least.”

“Or a few hours,” Keith adds, side-eyeing Kosmo.

Kosmo looks away, ears drooping.

“He’s a growing boy, just like you,” Krolia says, offering Kosmo a piece of already cooked meat. It’s more like jerky at this point, but Kosmo seems to love it well enough since he scarfs it down in seconds. “And it’s not like we’ll run out, there’s enough of these creatures around us.”

She sits down across from him, offering more jerky when Kosmo trots over and sniffs her hand. He rests his head on her lap as he chews on it, clearly enjoying the way she runs his hand down his flank.

Krolia speaks up after a while. “I saw more visions of your past.” Her gaze is piercing when he looks up at her, curiosity written in the lines of her face.

“I saw some of yours, too,” Keith replies with a small grin. “I never thought I’d see Kolivan without a braid.”

“It took many years for him to grow it out, he’s rather proud of it,” Krolia says, lips twitching with hidden amusement. “I do have a question for you, though.”

Keith nods.

“Who was that man that was always with you?”

He chokes on air and has to clear his throat several times to get himself under control, peering at her through watery eyes. “What do you mean?” Keith asks hoarsely, though he’s certain that he knows exactly who she’s talking about. “What man?”

“He had black hair and grey eyes in the memories of that school… the Garrison, yes. Then he had white hair, a scar across his face, and a bionic arm in your Voltron memories. He also piloted the Black Lion.” She tilts her head. “He’s the only constant in your past, so who is he?”

“His name is Shiro, and he’s…”

 _My best friend,_ he wants to say. That was always the answer he gave to the people who bothered to ask, but now the title feels too simple for Shiro. After everything they’ve been through, Keith feels that they’ve moved beyond that.

“He’s everything,” Keith finishes, staring down at his hands with a silly little smile. “He’s the one person who never gave up on me, not even when everyone else already had. I don’t know where I’d be without him.”

“Ah,” Krolia says. “I see.”

Even though she might have already seen it, Keith tells her about all the things that Shiro has done for him. He tells her about the things they got up to at the Garrison, how much danger they faced together when they became Paladins of Voltron, and the private moments they shared when the world became too much for them.

After that first conversation about Shiro, Keith brings him up more. It’s not like it’s hard since Shiro is constantly on his mind.

“Shiro carries the weight of the world on his shoulders,” Keith tells her one night, eyes downcast as he surrounds the firepit with rocks. “He hates worrying people and hides his own pain. I try to help him when I can because I know he won’t ask, but I wish I could do more…”

“From what you’ve been telling me, this Shiro seems like the kind of man who cares about you as much as you care about him,” Krolia replies, dragging in one of their newly crafted barrels that grew full with rainwater. “I think he already appreciates all that you’ve given him, regardless of how much that may be.”

His cheeks stayed warm after that.

Keith and his mother are at the point in their relationship where talking has become easier for them, the two of them working through and moving past old pains as they continue to see each other's memories.

Kosmo also gets tangled up in the energy that the quantum abyss often radiates, though his past memories mostly revolve around Keith—protecting him, petting him, feeding him, singing silly little songs whenever Keith washes him. It’s safe to assume that the wolf has also experienced theirs, especially when he’s quick to comfort them after a particularly emotional one.

Keith rarely gets visions of the future and even when he does, nothing substantial comes from them. They’re too blurry and distorted, always disappearing before he can attempt to make sense of it.

(There was one he got that was a bit more clear than the rest. A baby was crying and soon, gentle shushing followed. He got a glimpse of his future self wearing a tired smile, looking off to the side where a future Shiro stood—face mostly hidden in the light. He was beaming down at a purple bundle in his arms, soft cooing coming from it as Shiro whispered something unintelligible.

When Keith came out of the vision there were tears dripping off his chin while a soft yearning made a home in his heart.)

One vision keeps recurring, the first one he got that had himself and Shiro. It makes him dread what’s to come.

Sometimes, he turns to his mother for advice.

“You might be put in a position where you will have to make a tough decision,” Krolia is saying as they’re gathering more firewood, Keith still shaking off the dizziness that comes with this vision. “I can’t tell you what to do, Keith. This is a task that you will have to get through yourself.”

“What if something happens to Shiro?” Keith asks. He hands a bigger piece of wood for Kosmo to teleport back to their shelter, which he only does after receiving a pat on the head. “I can’t lose him again.”

“Even if that means you’ll lose yourself?”

“Yes.”

Krolia stops what she’s doing and looks over at him with a serious expression. Her eyes soften as she continues to scrutinize him, lips forming a tiny smile.

“You love him,” she says quietly.

Oh.

_Oh._

_Everything makes sense now,_ Keith thinks faintly.

All the feelings that he’s had for Shiro always felt stronger than they should be, never fading away even when others thought he was gone for good. He never bothered to try and figure out what it was, content with the perpetual warmth that resonated through him whenever he was in Shiro’s presence.

He’s also never experienced that type of love.

Being with someone was always a foreign concept to him. He never had the urge to seek out partner, never thought of being intimate with another person, and he was never attracted to anyone at the Garrison.

That’s not true, a voice whispers in his head, Shiro’s image—black hair wild after a ride on the hoverbike, beaming in the light of the setting sun—flitting across his mind.

Not that he knows, he thinks that it was always there. It must have developed back when he decided to break his walls down for Shiro, letting him enter his very, very small circle of trust. He remembers the fluttery feeling he used to get in his stomach whenever he thought about meeting with Shiro again, the way his stomach would swoop whenever Shiro smiled at him, and the electricity that shot down his spine whenever they touched.

He had a crush back then, and it’s lingered long enough to develop into something beyond that.

Keith _loves_ Shiro.

“I do,” he says, equally quiet. “I really do.”

“You should tell him.”

“I will,” Keith promises fiercely. “When the time comes, I’ll tell him.”

 

☆ ☆

 

_“I love you.”_

It was said in a moment of desperation, hoping it would be enough to snap Shiro out of Haggar’s control. It did stop him for a second—he saw the way Shiro’s eyes went wide before narrowing, heard the way his voice pitched when Shiro _begged_ him to let go.

Keith’s love was enough.

He regrets having to cut off Shiro’s bionic arm to save himself, anguished that the Galra ( _him_ ) have taken it from him yet again.

But then Shiro looks up at him, face losing that wicked look from before, and breathes out one word that makes his heart soar.

_“Keith…”_

Keith doesn’t even have time to be glad over the fact that he got through to Shiro and brought him back, can’t even give much thought to his confession (beyond a mantra of _finally, finally, finally_ ), because the world begins to fall apart around them.

He grabs ahold of Shiro before the platform collapses, holding on tighter when they’re dangling off the side. Keith refuses to let go even when they’re falling. He can’t, not after everything they’ve been through together, not after the universe has kept them apart so many times before.

And if holding on means that’ll he’ll die… then so be it.

He will never give up on Shiro.

Just like Shiro never gave up on him.

(Keith would follow Shiro anywhere; to the Garrison, to distant planets, to new solar systems, to the end of the universe and back.

Even in death, Keith will follow him.)

There is debris right behind him, bright stars surrounding them, and the dull grey planet beneath them. Keith keeps his eyes on Shiro’s face as they fall and he eventually manages to close the distance between them to wrap both arms around Shiro’s body. He closes his eyes, again, as he waits for the inevitable end with Shiro.

 

.

.

.

 

Except, it doesn’t happen.

Learning that Shiro, the real Shiro, actually died after their battle with Zarkon makes him feel as though he’s been gutted open, the knife dragging up slowly until it pierces his heart.

This whole time he’s been trying to save Shiro and keep him safe, not knowing that he already failed.

After the battle with Lotor, after losing their home, they touch down on a nearby planet to try and help Shiro. Allura defies all odds and achieves the impossible, pulling Shiro’s spirit out from the Black Lion and transferring it to the Shiro lying on the ground.

It works, and Keith couldn’t be happier.

_“You found me.”_

Shiro looks up at him from where he’s slumped against Keith and he feels everything slot into place—all the broken pieces of himself stitched together now that Shiro is truly back with him.

 

☆ ☆

 

The plan is to stay on that barren rock until their Lions recharge enough energy to start making the trip back home, a task that’s made harder without the Castle of Lions helping them along.

Black sends a wave of reassurance when he worries, telling him that all they need is time.

They can give them that.

Hunk and Pidge curl up near the fire that they made, both already fast asleep after the tiring events that took place only hours before. Allura is dozing off on Lance’s shoulder, the two of them sitting beneath the Blue Lion, while Lance stays awake and keeps an eye on her (which he insisted on doing since he was worried about how she’d be after using so much of her power). Coran and Romelle are sitting together, the former doing most of the talking while the latter looks on with intrigue—he’s most likely talking about all the great things of Altea.

His mother is walking the perimeter they’ve established, making sure the area is secure with Kosmo at her side. Occasionally she’ll glance his way and even from where he’s sitting, beneath the Black Lion, Keith can see the way she physically relaxes at the sight of him.

They keep Shiro in the pod for about three days, bringing him out of it when all his injuries from their fight have disappeared. He barely wakes when Keith pulls him into his arms, which would be worrisome if Keith didn’t know that rest is what Shiro needs.

He sit back against one of the Black Lion’s paws with Shiro’s head pillowed on his shoulder, keeping a tight hold on him. The others offered to make a bed for Shiro using their jackets, but Keith declined and told them he was okay with this—which is completely true, if not for a selfish reason.

Keith just wants to be sure that Shiro is truly safe, which is easier to do with Keith holding him. Dressed only in their undersuits, the lack of armor allows Keith to rest a hand on his chest to feel his steady beating heart.

While the other Paladins are stretching their legs by exploring the planet, Keith gives in to the urge that’s been building up inside him since Shiro came back.

Sliding his hand up to his face, Keith slowly begins to trace Shiro's features. He brushes over the edges of his scar like he's always wanted to do, skimming the shadows under his eyes and the exhausted lines that linger in sleep. Keith eyes the whiteness of his hair and eyebrows, guilt-tinged thoughts racing through his head— _if only I got to him sooner, if only I was faster, if only I noticed, if only, if only, if only._

 _No,_ he tells himself, stroking a thumb across Shiro’s cheekbone. _There’s no time for that. You did what you could, and now you have to move forward. That’s all you can do._

It’s a hard realization, one that Keith has slowly been learning to accept. He might not get there now, but he will eventually.

He keeps up with his ministrations, too lost in his head to notice when Shiro’s eyes crack open a sliver and peer up at him. Keith only comes back to himself when he hears a low murmur of his name, followed by a cough, and looks down at Shiro in surprise.

“Shiro,” he breathes, arms tightening around him. “I’m sorry, did I wake you?”

“... thinkin’ too much,” Shiro slurs out, eyes closing again. “Can pra’tically hear your thoughts.”

“Oh, yeah?” Keith challenges teasingly. “Then what am I thinking about?”

“Can’t tell you,” Shiro replies with a tiny quirk of his lips. “S’a secret.”

“You’re the worst,” he says fondly, delighting in Shiro’s soft huff of laughter. Keith brushes Shiro’s hair to the side, heart jumping when he pushes his head up into Keith’s hand. “How are you feeling?”

“Feel like I can sleep for a year.”

“You should. You deserve it.”

“And miss out on all the fun? No way.” Shiro hums quietly, shifting against him and opening his eyes—soft and pleased, with a hint of seriousness that makes Keith’s stomach churn with worry. “Besides, I wanted to talk to you.”

Shiro doesn’t add anything else, slowly moving off Keith’s lap to sit beside him. Keith doesn’t outright offer help, only extending a hand for Shiro to use as stability as he settles against the paw.

“I feel like I’ve been asleep for a long time,” Shiro starts, staring down at his lap. “Thinking when I’m not completely passed out.” He lifts his head, a frown on his face. “I’ve been trying to differentiate some things, too. Think you can help me out with that?”

His answer is quick, with no hesitation, “Yes.”

“Sometimes I dream that we’re falling,” Shiro says, keen eyes locked with his. “We’re falling to our deaths, and you never let me go.”

Keith hears the unvoiced question— _is it real?_

“I wasn’t going to lose you again,” he says quietly. “Not after everything we went through. Call me selfish, but I couldn’t stand the thought of living in a world where you no longer exist. If that meant dying, then I was okay with it; I was with you.”

“Keith—”

"Then I remembered something," Keith continues, smiling apologetically for interrupting him. "Back at the Garrison when I got into that fight, you told me that you'd never give up on me. You said that I—”

“—can’t give up on yourself.” Shiro finishes softly. “I remember.”

“I was ready to die with you, Shiro,” he tells him truthfully. “But, you have to know, I also wanted to _live_ with you.” He reaches for Shiro’s hand, thumb stroking across his knuckles. “I couldn’t give up on us just because we were going to face the end together.” He smiles. "Then I was suddenly talking to you in that place… and then I woke up in the Black Lion.”

“We felt that you were in trouble,” Shiro says faintly, eyes far away. “I pushed her, _us,_ to go save you before something happened.”

“You saved me,” Keith says in a hushed voice, half-lidded gaze locked with his.

“Yeah.” Shiro’s cheeks stain pink, much more pronounced in the light of the slow-rising sun. “Of course I did.”

Keith squeezes Shiro’s hand and lifts it up, brushing his lips across the back of it without looking away—all of his devotion laid out before him, chest cut open and heart exposed for the man he loves more than the entire universe.

“Thank you,” he breathes. _I love you._

 

☆ ☆

 

Shiro remains asleep for the rest of their stay on that planet, waking up sporadically and accepting the water that Keith hands over before drifting off again. Food is harder to get into him since Shiro struggles to hold the plate and utensil, but at least he accepts Keith’s offered help.

He thought Shiro would protest when he first suggested it and ended up being very surprised when the man readily agreed, so long as no one else saw.

Once the Lions recharged enough to get them up in the air, they packed all their belongings and moved on to another planet. This one had small towns filled with markets and friendly vendors, who agreed to keep their location a secret if the Paladins helped them out with some rebuilding.

They accepted their terms and were given empty huts as a temporary living space, located on the outskirts of the towns. It was right by a large empty field, which allowed them to park their Lions in a spot that wouldn’t bother the locals.

Keith mostly stayed by Shiro’s side, happy to see him resting in an actual bed. Krolia would often take his spot whenever he left to wash up, get some food, or help the others when extra hands were needed. Kosmo also liked to sit in whenever his mother was busy, keen eyes locked on Shiro’s form and tail wagging whenever Keith praised him for a job well done.

His injuries have been healing fast thanks to his Galra side. It used to confuse the hell out him when he was younger, but it all made sense after the discovery of his ancestry.

Shiro regains enough energy to walk around on his own, tiring after less than an hour. Keith is usually right there by his side, trying not to hover as he makes sure that Shiro can get around okay.

Touch soon becomes a constant fixture in their lives.

It evolves into something that can't remain hidden. Keith and Shiro seek for each other no matter where they are, searching for the comfort they've created in one another.

Their friends never question them over their new closeness. They don’t tease them when Keith links their hands together and there’s no surprise on their faces when Shiro chooses to doze off on Keith’s lap instead of a bed.

Sometimes he does sleep on it, but he’ll only do so if Keith is right beside him.

It’s almost like he can’t relax unless he’s sure that Keith is nearby, which Keith understands since he’s been feeling the same way.

There’s been an increase in hugs as well, naturally occurring after a conversation between the two. Shiro also likes to drape his arm across Keith's shoulders whenever they're sitting together, sometimes playing with strands of his hair. He’s always eager for whatever Keith gives him and is quick to reciprocate.

Maybe Shiro’s a bit touch-starved.

Keith wouldn't be surprised if it were true, especially after knowing that Shiro has spent so much time trapped in the Black Lion—completely alone.

Keith is happy to give Shiro whatever he needs, finding comfort in the feel of his warm skin beneath his fingers. Sometimes he'll stroke a thumb across Shiro's wrist, feeling the way his pulse flutter beneath it. Most nights they'll gradually shift closer in sleep, and he'll wake up with Shiro's warm weight on his chest.

It used to toe the line of intimacy before, neither of them daring to step over it and embrace the parts that would make them _more._

They've taken a big step forward now, causing that unspoken thing between them to grow. Even those two years on the back of a space whale did nothing to dampen Keith's feelings.

Nothing ever will.

He doesn't know Shiro's feelings on the matter, but there are times when Keith catches Shiro's stare and feels a pulse of _something_ reverberate through him. The low buzz of it is similar to Black, though on a much _softer_ level than what the Lion gives off.

It always disappears whenever one of them looks away.

Keith can’t figure out what it is or why it keeps happening but the amused purr that Black sends through his head leads him to believe that it must be important.

He’s seated in the Black Lion when it comes up again, getting ready to leave the sunny planet they had touched down on for a day. Their bond flares to life when he curls his hand around the handles, bringing his attention to a new connection that’s so much stronger than the one he has with Black.

It’s so familiar, flooding him with warmth when he brushes up against it. A gasp spills out of his mouth when it surrounds him, making him feel safe in its embrace.

“Keith?”

Electricity shoots down his spine when he feels a hand on his shoulder. He opens his eyes to look at the source of the touch, Shiro is gazing at him with an expression of shock, lips parted as if he was going to say something.

The Black Lion suddenly rumbles beneath them, and then it’s taking off without his say. Keith grapples for the controls and tries to guide them back to the group. She refuses to listen, releasing an amused purr that he feels deep in his bones as she flies them farther and farther away.

“What’s going on?” Shiro asks in his ear. He has to fight his shiver.

“I don’t know!” Keith gives up fighting for control, dragging a hand down his face. “Guess we gotta see where she takes us.”

His comm springs to life, questions asked (Pidge, Allura, Hunk, and Coran) and complaints made (Lance) as they fly across the planet. Keith’s mother interjects with cheerful farewell before they’re disconnected, leaving Keith and Shiro in a heavy silence.

It stays like that until Black finally lands, urging the two of them out of the cockpit to the top of her head. Her presence leaves his mind the moment they’re standing up there, lingering on the edges of their bond; still there, but also giving them privacy.

 _For what?_ Keith wonders.

Shiro sways as he starts to lower himself down. Keith holds out a hand, offering help without saying it, and Shiro gives him a tiny smile that makes his heart flip in his chest.

A spark races up Keith's arm when Shiro takes it, twin gasps filling the air as something new awakens within them—except it’s not new, Keith realizes when he locks eyes with Shiro, that low buzz of energy becoming stronger.

“Oh,” he breathes, sitting down when his knees start to feel weak. He doesn’t let go of Shiro’s hand. “It’s you!”

“It’s you,” Shiro repeats, face lit up with joy. “Of course it’s you…”

“I guess Black wanted us to talk about this,” Keith muses, gaze falling on their joined hands. “Got sick and tired of us being confused all the time, I bet.”

“Makes sense.”

They stay quiet afterwards, the only sound being Shiro’s hitched breath when Keith flips his hand and begins drawing imaginary patterns with his finger.

Keith can’t help but think that maybe Black wanted them to talk in general, judging by her faint exasperation when they continue to remain silent.

Maybe they should while they have the privacy that Black has graciously given them.

“Shiro,” Keith begins slowly, starting to trace the lines of his palm. “Before, you said you would dream of us falling. Does that mean you…?”

Shiro’s voice is soft and despondent, guilt present in his eyes when Keith looks up at him, “I remember everything.”

Keith stills when Shiro brings his hand up and brushes fingers over the right side of his cheek, where his scar rests. Guilt enters his eyes, and Keith reaches up before Shiro can pull away and guides his palm to rest against the injured cheek.

“It wasn’t your fault,” he tells him. “And it wasn’t his fault, either. Haggar was controlling him the whole time, starting at the Castle and ending with this scar.”

“How can you be so sure?” Shiro asks with a touch of desperation. “I have all his memories, I know he was pushing you away… who’s to say that he wasn’t made to tear us apart?”

“Because he was still you,” Keith answers. “He was a clone of you, Shiro, which means he had all of your old memories and feelings. Haggar may have been influencing him, we don’t know, but he cared for us. He cared for us because you did.”

“But he still hurt you,” Shiro says in a broken voice. “ _I_ still hurt you.”

“Then I forgive him,” Keith replies, turning his head to press a kiss to Shiro’s palm. “I forgive you, Shiro.”

Shiro releases a choked sound, causing Keith to look up at him. His eyes are shining, and he looks so wrecked as he stares at Keith with an expression of disbelief. He lets Shiro’s hand slide off his face, meeting him in the middle as they fall into an embrace—Shiro burying his face in Keith’s shoulder while Keith rests his cheek against the side of his head.

“I forgive you,” he repeats, arms tightening around Shiro when he begins to tremble in his hold.

Shiro cries silently, clutching at Keith's armor like it's the only thing keeping him afloat. All Keith can do is hold him and never let go, taking the role of his steady rock and giving him the comfort he needs.

After a while (he doesn’t know how long and he doesn’t particularly care), Shiro releases a few shuddering breaths before pulling away. His cheeks have a touch of red, embarrassment palpable; actually, he can feel it through the bond.

Keith is quick to pull back from it, temporarily closing himself off so he won’t intrude on Shiro’s emotions. It’s easy to do since he’s had enough practice with Red and Black.

“Where’d you go?” Shiro suddenly questions, voice slightly hoarse. He’s rubbing at his eyes with his hand, obviously trying to get himself together before looking at Keith again. “Don’t leave… I like feeling you…”

His cheeks flare with heat, mind going to a different place than what he meant.

“I do too,” he admits, breaking down the wall he built up. Keith can feel himself smiling, and sees the same one on Shiro’s face—happiness and contentment rushing through his body.

A thought occurs.

“You remember everything… does that mean you remember—”

“Keith,” Shiro interrupts softly, red spread across his face. It makes his scar stand out, an endearing sight that makes his stomach swoop. “I love you too.”

Their newly discovered bond _sings_ after the words are said, the sentiment bleeding through and telling him that Shiro speaks the truth (though he never thought otherwise). Sparks are ignited when they reach out to touch each other again, and Keith is breathless as Shiro’s love wraps around him like a warm blanket.

“I know,” he says with an elated smile that’s returned. Keith leans forward to press their foreheads together, closing his eyes and basking in the essence of Shiro. “I can feel it.”  
  
A shaky exhale ghosts over his lips, and Keith feels hope trickle through the connection. “I feel yours, too, but…” Shiro says, voice containing a pleading undertone when he asks, “Will you say it again?”

“I love you,” Keith says with no hesitation, making sure to pour all of that love into the bond. He closes the small distance between them by capturing Shiro’s lips in a kiss, enjoying the way Shiro seems to melt into it.

It doesn’t last for very long, but it’s apparently enough to leave them breathing hard and flushed. Keith can’t stop staring at the dazed expression Shiro wears, reaching up to brush a thumb over his bottom lip.

“I love you,” he says again.

Shiro’s lips twitch. “I know.”

Keith rolls his eyes (fondly), lightly shoving him away. “I can’t believe you just pulled that with me,” he grumbles good-naturedly.

“I can,” Shiro says with a laugh, lying back on the Black Lion. “It works for us, doesn’t it?”

Keith moves until he’s hovering over Shiro. The smile on his face is brighter than any star in the galaxy, and the light of the setting sun makes Shiro's hair look like it's glowing.

He’s so breathtaking and ethereal that Keith has to lean down and kiss him again, their bond practically vibrating with the intensity of their love and making him feel Shiro more than he already does—beneath him and in him, the two of them becoming so intertwined that it’s hard to tell where one begins and one ends.

“I love you,” Keith breathes against his lips, unable to pull away.

Shiro’s hand buries itself in his hair as if he feels the same way, and echoes in a similar breath, “I love you too.”

 

☆ ☆

 

Black takes them back when the sky begins to darken, Shiro in Keith’s lap as while she does—and didn’t that produce the most lovely shade of red across Shiro’s face?

The team wasn't too annoyed with them, thankfully, and there are no questions are asked when Keith drags Shiro in for a quick kiss (just because he can). There was some eyebrow waggling from Lance, which Keith promptly ignored.

Kosmo teleports to his side the moment they sit down by the fire for dinner, making huffing noises as he crawls onto Keith’s lap. He nudges Keith’s hand several times and peers up at him with sad eyes.

“You big baby,” he tells him and scratches behind his ears when he releases a whine, glancing over at Shiro when he hears his soft gasp.

Shiro is practically staring at the wolf with stars in his eyes, hand twitching like he wants to reach out and copy Keith’s actions. Keith meets his gaze and nods his head once. That’s all it takes for Shiro to give in and start petting Kosmo.

Kosmo stares at them sadly when they have to stop to eat until Keith tosses a piece of creature jerky his way to tide him over. He had saved a few pieces when he got off that space whale, too used to the taste to give it up so soon.

The wolf eagerly sprawls across Shiro’s lap once they’re done eating, drifting off while Shiro is petting him. Keith can see that it’s keeping Shiro relaxed and thinks that Kosmo might be good for both of them.

He shifts closer to press their thighs together when Shiro’s brows knit together. “What’s wrong?” Keith asks, nudging his side.

“Just thinking about how I never expected to make it here,” Shiro says quietly.

Keith frowns. “What do you mean?”

"No matter how many times I begged Black to let me out, I knew it was it for me," Shiro says with a shaky exhale. "I was dead, and nothing was going to change that.

"You were right there the whole time, and I couldn't even help you," Keith replies with a shake of his head. “I could have saved you sooner…”

“Hey, hey. Don’t start thinking like that.” Shiro reaches over and squeezes Keith’s knee. “You couldn’t have known what had happened to me. I didn’t even know at first, not until Black finally reached out and told me what she had done.”

“I should have searched harder,” Keith mutters. “I was just so relieved when I found you… him. All the pain I felt was gone when I looked at his face.”

“He felt that way too,” Shiro whispers. “And so do I.”

“Is it weird?” Keith asks, elaborating when Shiro’s expression turns confused, “Having two sets of memories?”

“A bit,” Shiro says slowly. “I remember being with the other Paladins, but I also remember existing in the Black Lion. Both timelines feel very real to me, so much so that I’m not sure if I can believe either one happened.” Shiro tips his head back with a sigh. “It’s mostly weird to hear him referred to as my clone when I feel like I was him, now. I know I did the same, but…” He shrugs. “What can you do?”

They stray away from the topic after that, sitting in a peaceful silence while the other human Paladins talk about the things they miss from Earth, sharing a laugh when Lance gasps in mock offense when Allura innocently questions what roller coasters are.

Keith brushes a hand over Kosmo’s flank when he shuffles over, stretched across both of their laps and looking very content with himself.

“Hey,” Keith says when Pidge and Hunk talk about all the different Earth amusement parks, paired with animated gestures and enthusiastic acting to try and get their descriptions across. He waits for Shiro to look at him and lowers his voice when he speaks, “I’m sorry, too.”

Shiro frowns. “What for?”

Keith’s eyes find what’s left of Shiro’s right arm, the metal of the Galran shoulder piece gleaming in the light of the fire.

“Don’t apologize,” Shiro says after following his gaze, releasing a self-deprecating laugh. “I would have killed you if you hadn’t cut it off. I’m glad you did, the thought of being the cause of your death is too much for me.” His voice softens as he links their hands together, a faint smile on his face. “Remember that conversation we had? After Naxzela?”

“Yeah?”

Shiro lowers his head and presses a kiss to the back of Keith’s hand, peering into his eyes. Keith’s cheeks grow warm and remain that way, somehow growing hotter when Shiro speaks again.

“Your life is precious to me, too.”

“You big sap,” Keith mutters, not trying to hide his smile.

They get up off the floor when their friends start heading off to sleep, Keith and Kosmo leading Shiro to the tent they’ve pitched up for the night. Shiro asks for help when getting undressed, and Keith is already at his side before he finishes the question.

Kosmo curls up by their feet while they both lie down on their sides, facing each other.

Keith shifts closer to close the gap between them, planting a kiss on the tip of Shiro’s nose. The fact that he can do this any time he likes sends a thrill through him, and the sleepy smile he gets in return causes adoration to swell within him.

“Keep me safe?” Shiro asks in a whisper, eyes fluttering shut.

“Always,” Keith breathes without hesitation, watching as Shiro physically relaxes. “You know I always will, Shiro.”

“As many times as it takes, right?”

He brushes his thumb over the curve of Shiro’s lips. “As many times as it takes,” he repeats softly.

It will remain true until the end of their days.

Keith and Shiro are now heavily intertwined with one another because of the bond created by Black, and the way they find each other no matter how much the universe tries to keep them apart is proof of that.

 

☆ ☆

 

Years later they sit atop the Black Lion, the stars shining above them as the night air brushes against their skin. They took a break from all the celebration that was happening earlier (and is _still_ happening, judging by the faint music that drifts towards them). Keith’s got Shiro’s human hand in his own, fingers interlocked as they enjoy the peace together.

They’ve changed since they left that barren rock, where they were all exhausted and battle-weary. It doesn’t seem like much time has passed, but Keith can see the differences when glances over at Shiro.

The white hair is ever-present, though Shiro did attempt to dye it back to black with minimal success. He's older now, just like him, and there's a lack of tension in his shoulders—no longer carrying the weight of the world. His arm shines beneath the moonlight, sleek white and glowing a familiar Altean blue at the joints. It works just like his old Galran one, the only difference being that it's not as heavy.

The both of them are currently in their Paladin undersuits, their armor in a pile beside them.

They’ve gone through so much since reuniting on Earth and then blasting off into space to become Paladins of Voltron. Now, they’re reaching a point in their lives where Keith feels like he’s ready to take the next step.

“Something on your mind?”

He looks over to see that Shiro’s watching him with a tiny smile. His eyes are curious, but Keith knows he would never push Keith to talk until he’s good and ready. The thought of that is enough to give him a little push.

“Can we stand up?” Keith asks, trying not to sound so nervous. “I have something to ask you.”

“You can’t do that sitting down?” Shiro counters teasingly, but he does stand after Keith does.

“I love you,” Keith says, squeezing Shiro’s hands.

Shiro squeezes back. “I love you too.”

He stares into Shiro’s soft, yet confused, eyes and takes a deep breath, squeezing his hands one more time.

_Here we go._

“Takashi Shirogane,” Keith begins in a steady voice, and his lips twitch when he catches sight of Shiro’s wrinkled nose. “Shiro,” he says, softer now. “I don’t know when I started loving you, but I do know that everything made sense after I figured out I did. It felt like it all clicked into place when I could finally admit it to myself.”

“Keith?” Shiro says. “What—”

“Let me finish?” Keith offers a quick smile, waiting for Shiro’s nod before continuing, “I’ve loved you for a long time, Shiro, and sometimes I can’t believe that you love me back. You’ve shown me what it’s like to be wanted and loved, to have someone that cares about me despite all my flaws and supports me no matter the circumstances.” He takes a deep breath. “You’re my best friend, but you’ve become more than that as well—you’re my soulmate, Shiro, and I’ll never love another as much as I love you.”

“Keith…”

“Now that the war is finally over, a future with you is all I want,” he says, releasing Shiro’s Altean hand to pull out the small wooden box he’s been carrying around.

Inside is a ring made of Luxite, gleaming purple and glowing at the edges. Kolivan had a small piece of it when they stopped by the Marmora base, and the Olkari helped him craft it into a ring that fits Shiro’s left ring finger.

It’s also connected to his life force, the glow of it informing anyone who sees it that Keith is still very much alive. He thought Shiro would like that.

“Shiro,” Keith says, meeting his gaze. Shiro’s eyes are wide and bright, cheeks pink as he stares back in obvious surprise. It makes his heart swell with love and gives him the courage to finally ask, “Will you marry me?”

“Oh my god,” Shiro breathes, staring down at the ring. “I can’t believe it.”

Keith tenses up, stomach dropping and chest tightening. “Shiro?”

“Oh! Sorry, baby. I didn’t mean it like that.” Shiro shoves his free hand into his pocket and pulls out a wooden box of his own. His smile is wide, and his eyes are teary. "What I mean is that I can't believe you beat me to it, I planned on doing the same thing tonight."

“So, it’s a—you’re saying—” Keith can’t even get the words out.

“Can I say what I want to say first?” Shiro asks, only continuing when Keith shuts his mouth and nods quickly, “We’ve been through so much, Keith, and most of the time I was only able to get through it because you were right there by my side.” He’s still smiling, even as a tear slips down his cheek. “You always see the good in me, even when I can’t see it for myself, and you help erase all my doubts with your unwavering belief in me. I couldn’t ask for a better partner, and I feel like the luckiest man in the world to be able to experience your love.”

“God,” Keith chokes out, so overwhelmed and in love. “Shiro…”

“I love you, Keith,” Shiro says softly. “And whenever I imagine a future for myself, you’re still there beside me.” He opens the box and inside is a black ring, faint streaks of red in there and glowing blue at the edges—so similar to the Lion they shared (and maybe it is from her since the comparison makes her purr happily in his head). The sight of it and Shiro’s open expression of love is enough to take his breath away. “I know you already asked, but I want to ask as well.”

Keith laughs. “Go ahead.”

“Keith, will you marry me?”

“I’m pretty sure we both know the answers to our questions,” Keith says with another laugh, surging forward to kiss Shiro. They’re both crying now, smiles never leaving even as they kiss and kiss and kiss.

They stop for only a moment, sliding the rings onto each other’s fingers before Keith wraps his arms around Shiro and drags him down for another kiss. He falls onto his back with Shiro hovering over him, the two of them eagerly peeling off their undersuits. Happiness radiates through the bond that still connects them, and the combined pleasure makes the experience much more intense for them.

“I love you,” Keith cries out with his head tipped back, arms wrapped around Shiro and clutching him tightly. He says it loud enough for the world to hear, so everyone knows that his heart belongs to someone. “I love you!”

Shiro doesn’t stop moving, doesn’t stop touching him, hands leaving bruises on his hips and teeth leaving marks against his throat. His voice is rough, but no less tender when he says, “I love you too.”

 

☆

 

☆

 

☆

 

“Hey, stranger.”

Keith whirls around, feeling his heart stop when his eyes land on his fiancé. Shiro is standing across him with his hands tucked into the pockets of his black suit, hair slicked back and a bright smile on his face.

“Hey yourself,” Keith replies with a smile of his own. They cross the path at the same time and meet each other in the middle, standing so close to each other. “You look…” He exhales hotly. “God, Shiro. You look gorgeous.”

“So do you,” Shiro says, gaze raking all up his body. “You look good in white.”

His heated eyes cause warmth to spread across Keith’s cheeks. “Yeah?” he asks with a smirk.

“Yeah.” Shiro’s hands slip out of his pockets, coming up to fiddle with Keith’s black bowtie (another match with Shiro, whose bowtie is the same shade of red as his old lion).

Music starts playing, soft notes drifting toward them, and they both smile at one another.

“Ready?” Shiro asks softly, linking their arms together as they face the other path they’re supposed to walk down. He doesn’t look away from Keith.

“More than,” he answers, not wanting to look away either.

Everyone rises when they stand beneath the archway made of tree branches, their next steps made on an aisle of orange blossoms and leaves. Keith can feel the stares on them as they pass by, but all he can focus on is the warmth that radiates from the man next to him—the love of his life.

Once they reach the altar (also made of tree branches, the same flowers weaved through them) the music slowly fades away. Allura stands before them, a bright smile on her face as she nods at them.

Her hands glow as they dance around Keith and Shiro, Altean seamlessly leaving her lips as she binds them together in matrimony. She asks them to face each other when she’s done, stepping back with her hands clasped in front of her.

The world seems to fall away as Keith stares into Shiro’s eyes, their connection _singing_ as they speak their vows and feel the bond sink deep into their soul.

“I love you,” Keith whispers after they slide the rings onto each other’s fingers.

“I love you too,” Shiro whispers back, curling his arm around Keith’s waist.

They meet in the middle once again.

The kiss is searing, all their love rushing through the bond on both ends—intertwining with one another, an intimate dance that takes his breath away and urges him to shift closer.

Their love is eternal, and they will remain tethered together even when death greets them for the last time.

Sound rushes in when they finally part: everyone clapping and cheering for them, sobbing coming from a few (mainly Coran, Lance, and Hunk), a happy howl from Kosmo, and the Lions roaring in the distance.

Shiro’s arm stays around him as they smile at their friends, their family, and Keith leans against him with a contentedness he never expected to achieve when he was younger. He looks up at his husband and meets him for another kiss, the two of them smiling into it.

This is the happy ending they fought for.

This is the first step into their forever.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed <3!
> 
> [Twitter](https://twitter.com/viribirb) (be warned, I am discussing and posting season 8 spoilers)


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